This boy. We shall call him George. George was skating down the street when he passed the market. George stopped and looked in when he saw this SWEET pair of shoes! They were priced for 20 bucks. So George rushed home and went to his dad who was mowing the lawn. "DAD DAD!" "what?" The dad said. "I FOUND THESE SWEET PAIR OF SHOES! Can you lend me 20 bucks?" His dad shook his head and George ran inside the house and went up to his mom who was washing the dishes. "Mom can you lend me 20 bucks for these sweet shoes?" His mom just looked at him funny and said, "No". Angry, George set off upstairs to his sister's room who was on the computer. "Sis can you lend me...." "GET OUT OF MY ROOM!!" She slammed the door in his face. George sighed and went to his room. But before he got to his door, he saw a 20 dollar bill on the floor. He picked it up and rushed to the store. Once he got the shoes he ran back home to his dad. "Dad DAD! Look at these.." He stopped and saw his dad that was under the lawnmower dead. George shrugged and went inside to his mom. "Mom mom! Look at these...." He stopped and saw that his mom was stuffed in the dishwasher, dead. George sighed and ran upstairs to show his sis. "Hey sis look at...." She was found with her head in the computer screen, dead. So George sighed and walked down to the living room. He plumped on the couch and wondered about how his family died. Then there was a knock on the door. George hesitated. It knocked again. He got up and went to the door. Opened it and out stood a penguin. He stared at the penguin. "What do you want?!" The penguin stared back. What did he say?????? Nothing penguins can't talk.

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Have you ever seen a dinosaur? No

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hating his life and his job, the man leaves work early and while he is in the elavator he has thoughts about killing himself after returning to his apartment he turns on the TV and grabs his gun out of the drawer. sitting in a chair with a gun to his head he looks at the TV and realizes that his office building has just been hit by a 747 piloted by Al-Quida members. Suddenly the man realizes that maybe he has something to live for and decides not to kill himself.

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A dog walks into a bar, the bartender quickly says to its owner that he must leave as dogs are not allowed in. Upon realizing that it is a seeing eye dog, the bartender retracts his statement and serves the owner a drink.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She is blind and deaf, so it wold be near impossible for her to do so without seriously injuring herself or another human being.

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I once met with Mahatma Gandhi and he said to me "Child, why do I walk this earth?.. What is the meaning of my living?.. Why am I alive?" and I bowed in respect of his wisdom and said "I don't know. Why do you?" and he said "I don't I'm dead."

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What did the kind hearted wolf do when he saw the small, helpless, fluffy bunny? He ate it.

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Why did Michael Vick run? Because he was being chased by defenders.

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A man walks into a bar... "Ouch"

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When I get aroused I get a solid snake

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What's brown and rhymes with snoop? Dr.dre

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How many dead babies does it take to fill a bathtub? 17.

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When is it okay for priests to touch underage boys? Ash Wednesday, they have place ash using their hands on the boys foreheads.

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What do you call two blacks on a bike? Two good friends having a good time.

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Q: What's black and white and red all over? A skunk in a blender.

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why did jonathan not get any presents for the holiday?because it was the 4th of July

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What's large, black and can be found in Australia? A large black Australian man.

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What did the black man get for Kwanza? AIDS

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Why didn't the boy get what he wanted for christmas? His parents had killed him.

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What do get when you mix cancer and a bike? Lance Armstrong

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A man walks into his house to see his TV is moving. He notices a black man who starts running when he enters. He then calls the police and gives a description of the man. The robber gets placed under arrest.

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Roofs are Red...I have a Cunt!!!

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How do you make a anti-joke on this website? Type it out, click I have read and agree to the Terms of Service, then press submit.

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Roses are red Violets are red The grass is red OH MY GOD, THERE'S BLOOD EVERYWHERE!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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