Why was six afraid of seven? because seven has cold, dead eyes.

Your mom is so skinny that she may have anorexia, yet she could treat it so she doesn't die.

What's worse than losing a contact Having a bloody stool

A man walks into a bar, sits down and the bartender comes over and asks him what he wants to drink. The man replies, "Carrot Juice."

Hey whats sad about 4 black people going over a cliff in a cadillac. Nothing

why is everyone always picking on ruth? because they just do

A man breaks into your house points a gun at your head and proceeds to fire a blank... The man stares at your for another minute before jumping back out of the window he crawled in from and sitting on the curb outside your house rethinking his life choices.

whats fat and ugly ? aidan slattery

Steve buys 60 watermelons.. What does he have? A lot of watermelons.

Q: Why did the fork cross the balloon? A: Apples

a man walks into a bar he has a drinking problem and we are all consered

Yo mama is so fat that her belly button reaches the door 15 minutes before she does- by Adam Chebali

Q:what's black and white and red all over? A:a panda bear that's been shot in the face.

An Arabic Muslim is on a plane. He's flying to Chicago.

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

What is worse than blue balls for a guy? Depending on the girl, absolutely nothing. Moral: FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? At age two, she contracted an illness that left her blind, deaf, unable to speak, and was considered backwards of intelligence. She lived in a dark and hopeless world of her own, rendering her unable to do anything, let alone drive.

Why was the man sad? Because he found his 80 year old mother had been raped and murdered in her home...

Q. What's worse than 9/11? A. That one shark jumping episode of Happy Days.

Women's Professional _________

A young boy walks into a catholic church, he attends mass, and leaves.

what do you call it when justin beiber makes a sex tape with selina gomez? lesbian porn.

They say once you go black, you never go black. But clearly they weren't referring to Nigel, who had an average-sized penis at best.

Q. Why did the Unicorn die A. It got hit by a Bus

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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