YO MAMMA IS SO STUPID, she was recently diagnosed with severe mental retardation and will have to be cared for 24/7

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What's cute and smokes? A cute person with a nicotine addiction.

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Several ways to annoy people: Grab the end of their shirt to blow your nose Try to shove a bowling ball down there throat Try to sell them a broom and vacuum Try to eat their babies paint their toe Nibble their ankles Ask if you can babysit their crystal and if they say no start whining Carry around your chicken and ask if they want a nugget

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What is brown red and white? I don't know, that's why I asked you

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Why did the black student fail his math test? Because he was severely traumatized by the school shooting that had occurred during the test. He was later relieved to hear that the teacher did not count the test, because the legal paperwork surrounding the death of 12 students was somewhat overwhelming.

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Why is ms Wolfe mean? Because she is a poop face

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a man walks into a bar. He left after he drank two beers. Someone pulled his pants down and he didnt notice. when he got home he realized his pants were gone. He returned to the bar to search, but it was a metal bar, and he was fairly stupid. please dont laugh

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why do you care what a chicken thinks?

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A black man and a white man walk into a bar, "what will it be" said the bartender. Milk, chocolate milk.

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all hail based mark

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What's worse than accidentally flooding your bathroom? A Tsunami

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Why was the African american pulled over in New Jersey? He was 17 and didn't have his red stickers.

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Why did the hockey cross the road? To get to KFC.

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Q. When you drink two 5 hour energies, do you get 10 hours of energy or double the energy for 5 hours? A. You die

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How many Haitians does it take to change a lightbulb? Typically one, unless the light bulb referenced is in an inconvenient location or is over-sized / industrial grade.

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What's the difference between a baby and a textbook? You throw a textbook at the wall with TWO hands.

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Remember when the new jokes on this sight actually used to be funny?

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why do my feet smell so bad? because i havent washed them for 5 days

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Guns don't kill people; high speed bullets and sharp projectiles launched at high speeds usually inflict painful and possibly fatal wounds that may kill someone. That someone loves and is loved by others.

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A duck walks into a 7-11 and says "Give me some Chap-stick, and put it on my bill!" But the cash register attendee doesn't speak English and cannot understand him. He does, however, question whether his God is punishing him because, as all people know, Ducks cannot speak. However, this hallucination must be punishment for a horrid misdeed. The employee breaks down into tears and begins reciting a prayer. The duck, slightly miffed, walks out, pondering why he'd need Chap-stick anyway, since he has no lips.

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A blind man walked into a bar and got a beer and got drunk and went on a rampage and killed YOUR MOM

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Its Erron, listen, we got to talk, I do not mind your pictures, but I am not going to call you because of that weird spot on your face, its just 101 basics here, I suggest you shut down the access to this site to the rest of your employees, this might get very personal.

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There are two muffins sitting in an oven. One muffin says "It sure is hot in here." The other muffin says "Holy shit a talking muffin

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What do you call a 46 year old man with one eye 4'5 and has one arm coming out of his chest Steve

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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