Roses are red, violets are blue, the little midget is coming for you. If you don't run and if you don't hide, you will probably be stepped on because of my incredible big size.

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A gay man walks into a biker bar and orders a drink. The bartender says "Hey, you want ice with that?"

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What does Obama, the President of the United States of America see when he closes his eyes? His eyelids

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List of people I love: Hitler Stalin Mussolini Ted Bundy Charles Manson Hannibal Lecter Vladamir Putin Satan Justin Beiber One Direction Chris Brown Chris Brown's parents Oh, and my mother. I love my mother, too.

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What's the difference between an ice cream cone and a pile of dead babies? I don't cum on the ice cream before I eat it.

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Why was Yabba annoyed? Because the idiots who do the audio description voiceover for Timmy Time on BBC iPlayer frequently refer to her as a male even though she is clearly a female duck.

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Why didn't the 13 year old boy have any friends? He was autistic and didn't connect properly with people.

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Your mama's so stupid because she has down syndrome.

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What do you call a black man with gold teeth? Cruchie.

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Why was it so hard for teachers to teach Tommy? Tommy is brain dead

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A terrorist robs a walrus.

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How many Mexicans does it take to screw a lightbulb? None, they couldn't cross the border.

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Why was the house painted pink? I dont know, why don't you ask the owner?

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what can't see and has four eyes? a blind kid born with four eyes

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What do you get when you cross an elephant with a rhino? Elephino. It just isn't relephant.

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What does a black person and ebola have in common? They both kill people

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there once was a black man who played basketball

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I think everybody should have a penis.

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One girl said to her friends, "LOL guys wait for me." She ran to a pile of corpses. The girl was about to lose her sanity as she was in denial when her friends had died. She held hands of two of the corpses and smiled and pretended everything was ok.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar. He than orders some drinks.

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Yo mama is so so skinny, when she sits around the house, she sits comfortably in every chair. - Stephen Colbert

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What did one apple say to the other apple? -Nothing, apples can't talk

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Yo mama so fat and ugly, I don't want to tell you how fat and ugly she is for fear of vomiting.

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What happened to the old lady with a hat? She fell down

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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