How do chinese families name their children I belive it would be child because chinese families are only allowed 1 child

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because there was no oncoming traffic.

Whats luckier than finding a lucky penny? winning the lottery.

What do you call a guy with alot of money? A rich guy.

an american an asian and a jihadist got on a train where did they go no where as the jihadist was strapped to c4

What do you get when you cross a 747 with a passenger train? A large colission with hundreds dead and injured.

The government

long in the tooth!

What Do you call a black priest? Holy shit!

What do you call a black pilot? A pilot.

If Jimmy had 5 apples and his brother had 5 apples then their father would have been married to their mother before they were born.

a jew walks out of a furnace

Q: Whats black and hangs from a tree???? A: A tire!!!!!!!!!!!

How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck would chuck wood? The etymology of the name woodchuck is unrelated to wood or chucking. It stems from an Algonquian (possibly Narragansett) name for the animal, wuchak. The similarity between the words has led to the common tongue-twister that you have just stated.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he’d rather be road kill, than be in the KFC right across the street,inside a kids meal,dead.

Your mom is so fat that she has diabetes and if she does not stick to her medical diet, her foot will be removed, but she started binge eating because of you in the first place, and if you don't straighten our your life, you will inadvertently be the cause of your mothers death.

Your moma's so fat, she has a considerable list of medical health problems, and she is very miserable.

John has 32 candy bars, he eats 28..what does he have now? Diabetes.

There is a wire, Let's put it on fire, The fire spread so did your legs, Now were both lying dead on your bed.

A penguin is driving through the desert when his car breaks down. He has it towed to a service station in the nearest town to be repaired. The mechanic tells him that it may be a while so he might want to take a stroll around town, find something to do for a while and check back a little later for an update. The penguin decides that as it is so hot in the desert town, and he is accustomed to a much cooler climate, he might enjoy a bit of ice cream. He walks to the local ice cream parlor, orders a large vanilla cone, and proceeds to devour the treat in a flash, covering himself in ice cream in the process. He has ice cream on his flippers, his face, and all down his stomach; he is virtually covered in the white, sticky goo. Upon returning to the service station to check in on the mechanic and his car, the mechanic say to him, "Well, it looks like the seal on your head gasket leaked, the transmission is shot, and you appear to be covered in ice cream." To which the penguin replies, "Yes, I have made quite the mess of myself. Today just isn't my day."

Why did the chicken cross the road? To look at the most interesting man in the world.

When is a door not a door? When it has yet to be created from its base components.

What do grass and deer have in common? They're both green I lied about the deer

why did the kid drop his ice cream? because he got ran over by a bus! (not a original, just funny)

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


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