two men walked into a bar the last one ducked

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Why did Alice cross the road? Because she wasn't funny. At all. So the people on the other side of the road asked her to do so.

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Roses are red Violets are blue What about green? That seems mean...

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People say that shit don't stink But shit does stink It stinks like shit!

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Whats long hard and has seaman? A submarine!

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Q: What's brown and looks like a weasel? A: A weasel.

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How do you become a multi-trilionere? Get bored...

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You will not press the like button.

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Okay, an ambulance is arriving for me (cops called it whatever I am fine) If you are still reading this then get the fuck out before I fire you no more messages.

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How do u kill a mocking bird? Stab it

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I hope you shut the others down before you called me by my name, otherwise this will convo will get fairly short.

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A priest, a rabbi, and a monk are standing near a cliff. They say that they are of the best religion. The priest jumps off the cliff and says "God save me", he dies. The rabbi says "Allah save me", he dies. The monk says "Buddha save me" he is saved, in relief he says "Oh thank God" he dies

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When an intellectual was told by someone, "Your beard is now coming in," he went to the rear entrance and waited for it. Another intellectual asked what he was doing. Once he heard the whole story, he said: "I'm not surprised that people say we lack common sense. How do you know that it's not coming in by the other gate?"

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Whats black white and red all over? A decapitated panda.

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An american took a vacation to Mexico.... the American police were contacted 3 days later... the American was supposedly killed during a drug trade...

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How could you wake up Lady Gaga? poke her face

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Why did 9/11 take place? Because God hates Satan

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What do you get when two chickens cross a road? -Salmonella stricken hobos

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Extra extra read all about it dunkin donuts has now been named dunkin pigs..a cops favorite hang out.

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How many people does it take to screw in a light bulb? To get to the other side

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why couldnt justin beiber get into the club? because hes not legal

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What can fly, but can not swim? Malaysia Airlines Flight 370

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Why did the kid need glasses? A monkey threw a fridge at him.

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so a square said to another square,your rather obtuse oh wait squares cant talk,whats going on. later that day,chuckles realizes he isnt funny -chuckles

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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