- Knock knock - Excuse me, I don't have time, my house is on fire ! - We're the firemen.

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Whats worse than finding a spider in your shower? Getting repeatedly stabbed in the dick by a rapid chipmunk.

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A man orders chinese food. His wife says "Honey, where's the cat?"

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YOU AINT GOT NO PANCAKE MIX the preacher then bitchslaps the black man

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What did the Asian father say to his son when he got a b? Good job son!

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What did the cannibal eat for breakfast? Waffles.

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yo mama so fat that when she jumped on her tempurpedic mattress the wine did spill

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"My father walked out on me." "Oh that's strange because I saw him yesterday and he had no legs."

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to your house... knock knock who's there the chicken

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Person 1: Ask me if I'm a truck? Person 2: Are you a truck? Person 1: No.

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Suicide Johnny and the Go Kill Yourselves

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why did the black man die? the man bled out, and doctors did everything they could.

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What do you call it when an Arabic man gets shot? Murder.

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Q) How do you kill a blue elephant? A) Shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a pink elephant? A) Hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a white elephant? A) Tickle it until it turns pink, hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

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Whats the same between an elephant and a grape? They're both purple except for the elephant

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What's the diffrence between a hockey puck, and an african child? They're both black, but usualy african children aren't round!

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yo mamas so cruchy people might mistake her for a cheeto!

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Roses aren't Red and Violet aren't Blue, do you know why i even like you

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I woke up in bed with someone this morning. I forget why this is a joke, but your mother is a whore.

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Why did the plane crash? because the pilot was a pineapple

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When life gives you lemons you have lemons.

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what's the difference between a black man and a tricycle well the black man's a human

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Why was the woman riding a camel? Because woman aren't allowed to drive in her country therefore she rides a camel as a way to commute. The camel's name is Gregory.

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A horse walks into a bar, it is then frightened and bucks a man in the chest. Animal control and an ambulance are promptly called. The horse is then taken to a stable, while the man is taken to the hospital where he later made a full recovery.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops