One day, a mother was speaking with her daughters. "Mommy," the first one said, "Why did you name me Daisy?" "Because when we brought you home, a daisy petal fell on your head." "Mommy," the second daughter said, "Why did you name me Rose?" ""Because when we brought you home, a rose petal fell on your head." "MMMBWWAAAAGGGH!" the last daughter cried. She was born with severe special needs and is incapable of coherent speech.

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Funny names Alec Balls Isaac Balls Dick Hedd Willy lickerr Lydia Stick Gaylord Sugar Fanny Gouger

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three friends are chilling one day and they all think they belong in Guinness book of world records the first guys says i believe i have the smallest arms in the world, the second guy says i believe i have the smallest nose in the world and the third guy says i hate to admit it but i believe i have the smallest dick in the world. So they all go down to Guinness book of world records inc. and the first guy comes out and says "YES I DO HAVE THE SMALLEST ARMS IN THE WORLD" the second guy comes out and says "YES I DO HAVE THE SMALLEST NOSE IN THE WORLD" the third guy comes out all depressed and mad and says "WHO THE HELL IS JUSTIN BIEBER"

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms Why didn't Sally get back up? She had no legs Guess who's getting prosthetic legs for Christmas! Not Sally.

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Three peasants were brought in front of the King to be rewarded for their assistance during a drought. The King told them that they could each request one thing from him that he could provide. The first man asked to be rich, so the King ordered his guards to fetch a large sack that was filled to the brim with gems and gold pieces. The man thanked the King and left his palace joyfully. The second man asked for a larger house so the King gave him access to one of his many castles. He hurriedly left, eager to try out his new home for size. The third man asked for a cat so the King gave him a cat.

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"You two form fours while I get the other one"

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bergin y u so tubbbbbyyyy?????

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Roses are red Violets are blue Charcoal is black So is my neighbor

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Your momma is so old that she might die soon!

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Why did the blonde commit suicide? Because she hated her life.

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What is the difference between a girl and a woman? Age

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Why did Mary fall off the swing. She had no arms Knock knock Whis there Not Mary.

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? Someone threw a fridge at him.

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why did the man die? he was shot

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What happens, when you give a blonde a Computer? She uses it like any other person because her haircolor has nothing to do with her Intelligence

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what do you call a Ukrainian who eats pirogi's A walking stereotype

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Q: why did the blind man walk off the bridge? A: because he was blind.

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life is like a penis, short but feels long when it's hard.

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Ever had Ethiopian food? Neither have they.

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What does the funeral director say at a jewish funeral? Ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes...

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Your mom is so black, i shot a bullet at her. It came back and said i need a flashlight.

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Why did the girl fall from the swing? She was laughing at an anti-joke.

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With the exception of pigs, both pigs and blue jays can fly

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where does someone with one leg work? -no where this is a recession

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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