If Oscar Meyer had a dog, what breed would it be? A golden retriever.

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DILDO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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What is black and red? Something that is black and red.

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Two dogs are sitting by a fire hydrant. One turns to the other and says absolutely nothing because dogs can't speak.

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"My c.ock is bigger!" "No! My c.ock is bigger!": Two gamec.ock owners arguing over who has a bigger dick.

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Your mother lives so loosely that she has several terminal diseases and only has 3 weeks to live.

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Q: Whats the difference between nude pics and your mom? A: I can wackk off to nude pics

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Why was there an awkward silence? Because numerous people gathered in a room were not talking.

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A black man and a white women are having dinner at a fanncy resteraunt. The waitor asks "Who is the better tipper... I know and hands the check to the white women.

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What did the car do? CRASH!

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When Michael Jackson was making his last son, he named him Blanket... he was cold.

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What do you call a sheep with big teeth? Mitch

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What did the mom say to her clinically depressed son? You're dad died

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Why wouldn't the baby boy stop crying when the babysitter was in the room? Because he put cigarettes out on him.

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What do you call a bunch of hobos having sexual intercourse? A soup kitchen

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There once was a man from Nantucket Who was stung on the head by a wasp When asked if it hurt he replied, 'not a bit, and he could do it again if he'd like to.'

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Have you ever seen Hellen Keller's house? Well it was really nice.

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How did OJ get away with murder? No one really knows. Probably because he an excellent group of lawyers

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What do you call a unicorn that is both invisible and pink? The Invisible Pink Unicorn.

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Rose are Red Violets are blue I have 5 fingers The middle one is for you.

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Why did Jimmy throw butter out the window? Because he had down syndrome

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Whats black and cant read white paper? An African

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Why isn;t the square root of peanut butter very athletic?.Actually, peanut butter isn't a mathematical equation nor does it have the necessary chemical make-up, physical properties or the biological construct that is required for it to be able to be considered athletic, stupid. You now have a inoperable tumor at the base of your spine. And I fucked your dad and shat in his mouth. Also, the cure for leukemia is my diarrhoea, you faggot.

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How can you tell an Irishman from a frenchman? Well, if you look back at both there heritages...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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