What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? I eat pizza.

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Leo! Leo get over here before i abuse you. Okay, im going to my whip.

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends. How hard can you throw?

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why did the boy get hit by a bus? because he was black

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(joker) Do you like fishsticks? (recipient) "No" (any response from the joker at this point qualifies as anti joke)

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What has a beard and bombed the World Trade Center? Oama Bin Ladin. No, but seriously he's a terrorist.

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Roses are green Violets are grey Tulips are a lighter grey I am colorblind.

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What did the doctor say to his patient? Doctors are not allowed to give out personal information involving their patients.

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why was the gay person gay? he liked penis in his bum.

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Why did the kid fall off the bike? Because he was paraplegic.

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If someone tells you to look behind you do you? No

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What did the girl with no eyes say? I can not see.

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What did the lawyer say to the doctor? - Could you please take a look at my neck it has been hurting there for several weeks now.

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A man walked into a bar and said "Ouch".

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How many alzheimer's patients does it take to change a lightbulb? To get to the other side

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Before Super Mario existed what did people play? Instruments.

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what has small feet? a human being with a tiny proximity of feet matter.

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A man walks into a bar. Ouch.

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Why did the boy fall out of the tree? This is no time to make insensative jokes you dick, Billy's on a hospital bed.

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What is chewy and tastes like gum? Chewing gum.

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If I give you 5 dollars, and you give me 5 dollars, then we both still have 5 dollars, which when combined will equal 10 dollars. Meaning we could buy something that cost's 10 dollars or less. But we should probably also factor in tax, so we should only buys something that costs a little over 9 dollars.

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Why did the chicken invent a memory ereaser machine? So he could erease everyone's memory so they would stop making chicken jokes

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Did you hear about the little girl who got a bike for her birthday? Shes dying of Terminal Cancer

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Did you hear about the blind carpenter who picked up his hammer and saw? Did you hear about the deaf shepherd who gathered his flock and heard (herd)? If you don't understand these, use your dictionary and look up the words "blind," "deaf," "saw," "heard" and "herd." http://gpsphone-tracker.com/

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops