One time there was a girl in a wheelchair and she couldn't walk.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf or bread. why did the plane fall apart in mid air? The engineer was a loaf of bread Why didn't the plane take off? because it was delayed.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

why was the Jewish person accused of stealing money? because the police found his finger prints.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervour father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happyness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What store adopted the dog ? The Pound

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A teacher, a consturction worker, and an army general are on an airplane. The pilot tells them the plane has too much weight, and if they don't each drop one item then the plane will crash. Realizing one item each is obviously not enough weight to throw off, the teacher and the construction worker team up and throw the army genral off the plane. They land safely, and live the rest of their life haunted by their vile actions.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Roses are red. Violets are black. Why is your chest, As flat as my back?

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why is a bulldog so aggressive Because it was raised for dog fights in basements Dog fights aren't right kids, and you should never get involved but if you find yourself in the cage fighting one of the dogs, you should really think about how you got there.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Two muffins are in an oven. The first muffin turns to the second muffin and says "OH MY GOD I CAN TALK!" the second muffin is so shaken in its beliefe system by a talking muffin that it commits suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Where do you find a dog? At a pet store.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

"Is this the Krusty Krab?" "Yes. What would you like to order?"

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's better than your mom dying? Chocolate Cake.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Life is like the Titanic. You cruise along on course and everything is great -- until you hit an iceberg and 1,517 people die.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Whats 10 times worse than a war? Ten wars.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What did the dog say to the cat before they fought? Lets fight

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A dyslexic agnostic insomniac stays up at night wondering if there's a dog.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have Ebola, You're going to die.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at its face.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How do you suppress a black hole? Surround it with white holes

thumb_up thumb_down -1

long in the tooth!

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Your Mother's breasts sag with such severity that the late, great surrealist artist Salvador Dali mistook them for clocks.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A guy watches TMJBtv on YouTube. He then shoots himself.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Steve, what do I write on a 3946 if more than two vehicles were involved?

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Adam ci ?mierdz?cy kutas mi sie ya mam

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops