I started a pottery course where the two instructors looked like Demi Moore and Patrick Swayze. The only other student looked like Whooping Goldberg. This teacher to student ratio proved invaluable as I am hoping to make a living as an artist and really appreciated all the extra attention.

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why was the boy sleeping in the basement? he was brought over from ethiopia to become a child sex slave and was now being help against his will in a basement

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Could switching to Geico really save you 15% or more on car insurance? Yes.

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One day I was hungry. I ate. I wasn't hungry anymore. Penis.

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Hitler wasn't that bad... He DID kill Hitler.

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Roses are red Violets are blue i cant ryme or spell.

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Engage in a lively debate with a friend, and when they are about to stump you, respond to whatever they say next with "What does that have to do with the price of tea in China?"

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Why did the chickens leave McDonalds? Because they refused to have their nuggets deep fried (Wyndellberg)

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What's the difference between Marvin Gay and George Straight. They are two different people

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Why did the car stop? It ran out of gas.

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4,000 yaks escaped from the zoo

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What's black and flies? Whatever it is, it's not a car.

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Why did the boy go to his room? Because his father told him to.

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Q: Ask me how far have you gone with a girl? A: Mexico

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What's it called when One Direction wins a Grammy Award? It's never going to happen; so why give it a name?

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How many Catholics does it take to change a light bulb? None. They use candles

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how do you wake up lady gaga? you set her alarm for the intended time

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" A few people laugh, but the horse, incapable of speech, does not. He is unfamiliar with this location and begins to panic. In his panic his leg is broken. He is put down shorty thereafter.

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when your cable is on the fritz, you play video games instead. when you play video games, you get good. when you get good, you go to COD XP. when you go to COD XP, you lose to whiteboy 7th st. when you lose to whiteboy 7th st., you get into Skyrim. when you get into skyrim, you reenact cut scenes from skyrim. and when you reenact cut scenes from skyrim... ...you take an arrow to the knee... ...don't take an arrow to the knee. Get rid of cable.

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What did the chicken say when it crossed the road? Nothing. Chickens can't talk.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Gestapo. Gestapo who? Your husband is dead.

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Your mom is so fat, she got obese and died.

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How can you tell that your friend just had sex with a blonde? The girl he just had sex with has blonde hair.

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Q: What do a duck and a bicycle have in common? A: They both have handlebars except for the duck!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops