How did little Timmy die? He was ripped to shreds by a violent badger.

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Why did the mother tell her son to get a job. She was tired of buying Generic brand food.

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what do you do when you see a black man getting hitted by a Mexican taxi? -Call 911

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your momma is so dumb.. ... because she was a slacker in high school but then turned her life around and is now a respected member of society

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Q. Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? A. being physically disabled due to a preventable accident, thus leaving you incapable of doing activities that are easily completed by an able-bodied person

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hi michael

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Chuck Norris can count from 1 to 100... twice!

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Whats green and has wheels? A Rednecks front lawn.

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When life throws you knives, you're probably dead

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Rampage, on the streets of the poor. Secrets finally leaving, escaping, rummaging out from the land and sea of unforgiven people. A loud shatter erupts from the roaring streets filled with silence, the people are coming. Engulfing the city. Red, blue, orange and yellow. Explosives and gun fire and blood flowing down into the drains, mixing innocent blood with the impure water. Violence, detonating everywhere. I see fire everywhere. Once a family home now a lost memory which cannot be found. Everything is burning, life and love. The streets not painted with red. It's soothing the sidewalk. Hush now. A shadowy night. It's whispers reaches all corners of the earth... 'The war is over' Blue skies light up the back lanes, darkness retreating back under its box of everlasting mystery They fought a war We are fighting one too (first letter of each line + final 2 lines are the last two lines of the original poem etc)

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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A black guy, a Latino guy and an Asian guy all walk in a bar. What do they all have in common? Believe it or not, they all liked cantaloupe.

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What's fat and ginger? My dog.

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Why doesn't Michael Jackson like toast? Because he's dead.

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whats white and gooy liguid goop

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What is grey and looks like a rock? A rock

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What do the poor have that the rich need? Nothing.

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Three politicians walk into a sports bar. Suddenly, everyone is watching the Stanley Cup playoffs.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a drawer? 10 25* *if you use a blender

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What did the tree say to the other tree?....nothing cause trees can't talk!

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HEY YOU!!!!

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Monkey see, monkey do.

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What Did batman say to robin before they got in the car..... Get in the car

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How long does it take a black woman to have a baby? Nine months, give or take a few days depending on whether she goes into labour early or not.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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