Knock Knock whose there brian Brian who oh because im chinese you assume my second name is Hu? terribly sorry theres been a misunderstanding, i was asking you surname, i should have been more specific! No it my fault, i dont know why i overreacted my second name is Hu its ok, what can i do for you? is it allright to come in for some noodles? are you paying? only a reasonable price ok then, dont see why not

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Roses are brown, Violets are brown, Stop shitting in my garden

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how much wood can a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood three wood

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What do you call a man named Jimmy? Jimmy

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms

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Why was the boy sad? He had just had his legs amputated and will never walk again.

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Why did the Mexican cross the border? He was being deporting because he over stayed his visa and is now an illegal immigrant

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why was it funny that the boy got a razor for christmas because he had leukemia

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A man wearing a chicken t-shirt and holding a pair of dentures walks into the Youtube headquarters, then immediately walks out in fear of getting a copyright strike.

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Why was Sally crying because a flock Of seagulls just took a shit in her head

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why was the kid sad? his fish died. he had to flush it down the toilet.

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Knock knock, Who's there? The cops, your parents are dead and now you are an orphan.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There I no road.

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(-(-(-(--)-)-)-) Look the chinese mafia

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What do you get when you cross an owl and a bungie cord? My ass.

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When I walk in the rain, I get wet

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Life is like a box of chocolates. Well...not really no. It's not.

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What did the blonde say when she tripped down the stairs? Nothing she was unconscious and had a serious concussion.

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Why did the car catch fire? It was parked in Ferguson, MO

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Mitt Romney penis

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How do you keep an elephant from charging? Shoot it with a high powered gun right between the eyes.

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How do you get a Jewish man out of a pool? Ask him politely, for I'm sure he's a pleasant and reasonable fellow.

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What starts with P and ends in ORN? Porn.

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What is worse than 20 babies stapled to trees? 1 baby stapled to 20 trees.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops