Two cows are standing on the top of North Pole and in a half-inch wind they're spanking a bottle of coconut jam. Suddenly two infrared gallopping fly past them. What's the consequence? That people shouldn't use freshly peeled lemoncakes on underwater cornfields.

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Person 1: Eric is in the hospital! I think it was those depression pills. Person 2: What did he overdose? Person 3: No he just took to much.

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Why did Steve refuse to have sex with a black guy? Because Steve is heterosexual.

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How many pollacks does it take to screw in a lightbuld? Likely the same number as is required when people of non-polish descent screw in lightbulds. Overall however it is variable based on the number or bulbs, position of bulbs in relation to ceiling, potential shakiness of required ladder, and desired efficiency. Please reference GE's lightbuld home instillation handbook for further information or alternately contact your local electrician or handy neighbor.

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Where was Andy Beckett WHEN THE LIGHTS WENT OUT? In the dark

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knock, knock whos there the police your son was the victim of a cruel homocide

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what did the blind and deaf kid get for Christmas? cancer

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When Nicki Minaj wrote her song "Stupid Hoe" she was sublimminally talking about her self.

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You're Adopted.

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What was the pirate movie rated? PG-13 for violence and mild nudity.

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What d u tell Simba when he's moving to slow? Muvasa

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So, a bulldozer rolls into a bar, there is no bar now.

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What do you call two banana's on someone's feet? Garbage.

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"We all miss somebody a lot every now and then, its only human! But never give up, just keep reloading and firing until you hit that somebody!" Moral: Moral, answer me, MORAL MOOOOORAAAAAAAAL! DUN DU DURUN, DUN DUN DUN! *gunshot* (The moral section just because I love them red thumbs ^^)

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Q: What's bigger than a volcano? A: Earth

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what is Justin Bieber+ One Less Lonely girl.... A BABY

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An Asian fails their maths exam.

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Why did the terrorist miss the flight he was supposed to blow up? He forgot his passport.

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Knock Knock Whos There? Boo Boo Who? Boo Radley.

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What can you eat that comes in all different flavors. Chex mix, I bet you thought it was women but its not its chex mix

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How do you fix America's national security issues? Nuke russia

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Roses are blue Violets are red Crap, I already messed up the joke.

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women's rights.

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Q: how many oxen does it take to row up the empire state building in half of a green canoe under the purple sun while eating a dead moose with no arms? A: Purple, because snakes have no elbows.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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