What do Elephants and Grapes have in common? They are both purple, except the Elephant.

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You know what's better than a taco? A better taco.

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What's worse than the holocaust? I'm a zebra so what is the holocaust.

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What does Snoop dog wash his clothes with Bleach

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What's the difference between a rock and a baby? You can't have sex with the rock.

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A woman who owns a parrot leaves her home, forgetting that a plumber is scheduled to come fix her sink. A few minutes after she leaves, the plumber arrives and knocks on the door. The parrot calls out "WHO IS IT?" The plumber replies, "It's the plumber. I've come to fix the sink." The plumber waits for a minute and, seeing that nobody has come to the door, knocks again. The parrot calls out "WHO IS IT?" The plumber replies, a little more loudly, "It's the plumber. I've come to fix the sink!" The plumber waits for a minute and bangs hard on the door. The parrot calls out "WHO IS IT?" The plumber screams, "IT'S...THE...PLUMBER!!! I'VE...COME...TO...FIX...THE...SIIIIIINK!!!" Just then, the plumber clutches his chest and falls dead to the ground. When the woman returns home, she sees the dead man in front of her door. She opens her door to go to her phone and asks the parrot, "who is it?" The parrot replies, "WHO IS IT?"

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Little old lady. Little old lady who? Little old lady who got hit by a bus.

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My pet rock died.

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Why did the wife leave her husband? Because they were having sexual differences and time restraints. The husband worked nightshifts as a nurse while the woman stayed home and took care of their child. The husband confessed he never wanted a child in the first place, and that having sexual intercourse with her didn't truly satisfy him.

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tobi packs fudge+parkers gay-sami

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No.

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why did Jen fall off the swing? because she had no arms. knock knock who's there not Jen

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your momma so dumb she put a battery up her but and said i got the power!!!

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Knock knock. Who's there? Super Monkey Ball. Super Monkey Ball who? No wonder it's super.

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How do you differentiate a Canadian from an American ? The American will have an American Passport,while the Canadian will have a Canadian passport.

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What is the worst part about being a blonde? Random green painted strangers throw forks at you claiming it will confuse you, because they got it off of an anti joke website!

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What's black, blue, and red all over? A baby after I kill it

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Why did Jimmy drop his ice cream? He was hit by a truck.

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Yo momma so fat you have aids

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"Do you live in the United States?", said the man. "no." said the other man, "cool beans", said the woman.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Who is your daddy And what does he do?

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If I have 7 oranges in one hand and 8 oranges in the other, what do I have? Big hands!

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What's good about freedom of speech? Only the idea. Try saying something about Muhammed or calling a cop a power-mad taxman.

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Yeah, so I was partially right when I assumed that you joined the feds in order to make sure the past would not repeat itself huh? The underground society never broke a simple rule, a single law, it simple grew from a bunch of dopeheads, to people capable of creating nuclear weapons... Just a matter of speaking of course.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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