How do you get a pirate out of your seat? Politely ask him to move for you were there first.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Is there any non dirty numbers these days, 69, just kidding

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Knock Knock I don't have a door. I'm Homeless

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Helen Keller went to town riding on a pony she stuck a feather in her hat and called it uuhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why couldn't little Jessica open the door? It was locked

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Q. what do you call a black guy? A. N IGGER

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Q. What's green, has wheels and flies? A. A garbage truck.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

what the difference between Obama and osama bin laden nothing

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Say silk 5 times. Silk Silk Silk Silk Silk Now what do cows drink? Water.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why was the little girl sad? Because she was brutally raped up the ass

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Sure, if my waifu aproves, hell, the more the hornier. CONDOMS? ARE YOU INSANE? CONDOMS ARE FOR PUSSIES... ..:WHIIIIIICH sorta makes sense so okay, my for a moment I thought you where not gonna go trough with this... Nah just kidding, I already got you, now if you want to break free I am gonna be like "MEH!" So, uh, you shaven or not? Please dont be "trimmed", sometimes it just looks like a pussy with a mustachio, thats bullshit.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why did the man feel so guilty after having sex...... He found out He was a tranny

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why did the kid drop his ice cream? He was hit by a bus

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Want to get shot? Go to Virginia Tech. Too Soon?

thumb_up thumb_down +25

A black man walks into a bar. His parents were immigrants from South Africa.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Person 1 - Have you heard about the movie about constipation? Person 2 - No. Person 1 - It hasn't come out yet

thumb_up thumb_down +25

A man is approached by a mysterious character in the streets, offering to tell him a dark and amazing tale. The man declines and walks away.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

a blonde, a brunette and a red head are robbing a bank, they hear the police coming, so they try to find a place to hide. The red head hides in cat cage, the brunette hides in dog cage and the blonde hides in potatoe sack. When the police come the brunetter says "Woof, Woof!" the red head says "MEOW! MEOW!" and the blonde says "P-O-T-A-T-O-E!"

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What did the football coach say to fire up his team? Nothing. He was not legally allowed to say anything to his team as they were being locked out by the coach's boss, the owner of the team and anything that he said to them could lose him his job.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

yolo mother f-uckaaaa

thumb_up thumb_down +23

How many dead babies can fit in a dead horse 11

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What is worse than finding an Apple in your Worm? Watching your dog jumping of a cliff

thumb_up thumb_down +23

One time I masturbated by myself

thumb_up thumb_down +23

That's what she didn't say

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops