- Anti Joke

A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog. Instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

Knock knock Whoes there? ...

why did the chicken cross the road? I Lied, it was a cow not a chicken and it was a highway full of speeding cars slamming into the cow body until it would stop moooooooooooooooooving...

A man walks into a bar and the bartender says, "What's up?" The man replies, "The opposite of down."

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a known serial killer.

How can a man go 8 days without sleeping? Sleep at night.

Hi

What do you do with a pickle jar full of semen? Use it for gel, because it took so long to collect it all, and you're frugal person who believes in recycling.

Why did the black man laugh at my joke? k.

What time does lunch usually begin on the other side of the world. Noon.

How do you make a clown sad? Rape his wife, choke his grandma and send him a video of you setting his children on fire.

Is that a baby in your carriage or are you just happ..... WTF. WHERES ITS EYES!? purges

What is purple and flies? A purple plane.

why did the zack fall off his bike because his mum thew a frege at him

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What's the difference between slavery and the Holocaust? Slavery happened.

kronkel spasm dizzle nork is short for: i cant believe you bought a ninja monkey to scratch your clownitis! i am randomly going to have a spasm cause i am down with that dizzle..... lets watch a show callled norks! i am pregnant with your baby ducky.

what do you get when you cross a rhino and a chicken? well, if you're unlucky and too close too the chicken, salmonella if you provoke the rhino, impaled

Why did the man burn all the children? He was a psychopath.

Why cant a black man and a white man cant be friends? Because bont mens are racist

What goes up a smokestack instead of down? Murdered Jews, when they get cremated.

A blonde, redhead, and a brunette are chatting outside a casino. The brunette directs a joke towards the blonde. "What's the difference between cotton candy and pork chops?" The blonde has heard the joke prior to this encounter and correctly completes it with sign language because she is deaf.

Saying "MY MOM" everyone time ur asked a question

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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