What do a grape and a plane have in common? They both have wings... except for the grape!

What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs sitting on a bench? Nothing. Why would you harrass a guy with no arms and no legs.

Yo mama is so fat she went on a diet and lost weight.

What does an Asian man, Black man, & a Hick all have in common with automatic weapons? The Asian is Vietnamese and fought in the Nam, The Black guy lives in the ghetto and was shot in a drive by, and the hick and his best friend got drunk and shot each other in the foot.

Tifa, seriously... You cannot look like the game character and have the same name! HEY I am craving for a bit of infamy, how about we claim that we is I! Which will make me seem completely pathetic for spending the whole night chatting with myself... Which is not bad at all actually...

Knock knock Who's there Ummmm....me u r looking right at me O yeah Ummm... Now what U knocked? No. O Ye Ok Alright cya

Knock Knock Who's there? Cancer

When the clock strikes the bell at elephantasourous during my erectionn i screw myself CC

What do a a pickle and a rabbit have in common? They are both green...except the rabbit

How do you wake up lady gaga? You poker face.

guess what? What? you have to guess...your mama

why did the black boy fall? he had terminal cancer and couldnt stand the pain anymore he died

A Mexican walks into an all white people bar. He then proceeds to buy rounds for everyone in the bar. Everyone thanks the mexican and everyone gets back to doing their own thing.

knock knock whose there? it's me, Connie oh hi Connie, wont you come in? oh i was just wandering if i could borrow your scotch tape ofcourse! one moment please. no problem. say, hows phil been? oh he's great, he just got a new job! here's your scotch tape! thank you so much! ....................... what a perfect scene. It is very unfortunate, though, for as Connie walked away from the family whom she borrowed the tape from, a car came by and with a single strike, killed her. this proves that nothing is perfect.

If I had a dollar for every funny joke on this site... I would have quite a few dollars. I would't be rich, but I'd have enough money to pay for me and three friends to go see a movie. So I'm talking like $40-$55, give or take. However, do keep in mind that that cost does not include the purchase of any popcorn/food/beverages.

2 women were sitting quietly

What do millions of men give their girlfriends every Christmas? AIDS.

Poop

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven had a serious alcohol problem that gave him violent tendencies.

What do you call poop in a black man's toilet? Poop.

What's black and hangs from a tree? A tire swing.

Out of all the sadness and death in the world...do you know what the worst part is? Mexicans are still hoping the border...

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he.

Wanna hear a joke? JORDAN SANDERS IN A RELATIONSHIP.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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