How do you get a clown off a swing Hit it with an axe.

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Q: What do you do when you find a black man bleeding from a bullet wound on your front porch? A: Call an ambulance! He may only have minutes to live before he bleeds to death! Hurry!

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I just flew in from New York and boy are my arms tired. I was jerking off during the entire plane ride.

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How do you flatten a worm? Feed it to a little boy, and then drop a refrigerator on him.

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You are reading this.Ya you the fat one

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Q: What did the twin tower say to the other twin tower? A: I'm falling for you.

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A cow walks into an Asian bar and asks for a beer. The bartender asks it for I.D. It says "it doesn't matter. I came by horse."

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What did the man do when he walked into the gym? Died of a brain aneurysm.

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Contrary to popular belief- And this just in. My daughter has breast cancer.

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A ninja walks into a bar the bartender asks "what would you like?" The ninja says "i'll have two green eyes" the bartender says "we dont have green eyes this is america" so the ninja is so mad that he goes home and brutally beats his wife with a spatula.

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what is the difference between pizza and a Jew? pizza is a common Italian meal and a Jew is a member of a monotheistic religion

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How does a black guy call to another black guy in Africa? using a telephone

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Bill: Did you hear someone said you sounded like an owl? Dave: Who?

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Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? getting fisted by hulk

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Who's gay and has buttsex? Dan.

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Chuck Norris drove to McDonalds and ordered a Whopper. Much to his dismay, McDonalds does not make Whoppers, because that is the signature fast-food burger of McDonald's biggest competitor, Burger King.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, What are you doing, I'm ithyphallophobic.

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Why was the picture so dark? Because it was night time and there were no light fixtures located anywhere near where the photo was taken.

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haha, you're an orphan

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The lemons on the tree are ripe. They will be picked.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She got shot.

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What do you call an asian guy in a police uniform? A police officer.

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Why was the pencil case unzipped? Because it wasn't zipped up.

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Q: What is a duck's favorite thing to smoke? A: Quack

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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