Why do black guys have big dicks? God felt bad putting pubes on their head

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Do you know what one golf ball said to the other? Nothing they are lifeless objects

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What did one muffin in an oven say to another muffin? Nothing, muffins are inanimate objects thus incapable of sppech.

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"Knock Knock" "Who's There" "It's Dallas" "Dallas Who" James and Dallas's relashonship quickly deteriorated as Dallas realized he and James been best friends for 2 years and James doesn't even know his name.

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What do you call a kid without any friends? A Sandy Hook survivor

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Q: What did the guy say to the apple? A: suck me off

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teacher: what is your name? student: some people call me attractive (mx)

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You dropped something.... Yo lip

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What did the rapist say to the child? Contrary to popular belief, I am just a kind old man that likes to hand out sweets to disadvantaged young children. I only got dubbed a rapist when a child crawled into the back of my van as I drove off; the fact that his abusive father was the one who raped him is not my fault.

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why didn't the donkey go to the party? Because, unfortunately he did not have the required linguistic skills to communicate with the person inviting. This is obviously dependent on whether the person who invited him was a human, if it was another donkey then perhaps this would of happened. However, this is also very unlikely as donkeys do not have parties or really communicate

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What is the difference between Julis Ceaser, and the moon? The moon is covered in rocks and craters, and Julis Ceaser is DEAD

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-Is this the Krusty Krab? -Yes, how can I help you?

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Why did the child say he had been a ubused. Answer: because he had been.

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What did the kid with no legs get for Christmas? A Pogo Stick

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Why do you never see elephants hiding in trees? They're really good at it

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How to open an orange? You don't you peal it

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Why did Jim go to the hospital? To get an autopsy.

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Why did the boy fail math? He got bad grades.

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Why don't sharks attack lawyers? Professional Courtesy

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I have two coins in my hand that add up to 30 cents, and one of them is not a nickel. I accidentally dropped them.

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A girl asks a Croatian bartender for a beer, the bartender replies, 'There is no beer in this bar.'

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Is this your pen? I wanna go to school, bye!

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"Horse walks into a bar. Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from. So, you should probably leave."

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? I'm a talking banana; what more do you want from me?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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