Why did the elephant cross the road? To get to the other side.

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What is so sad about 5 black people going over a cliff in a Ferrari? That was my Ferrari by darragh hamilton

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If life throws you lemons, get under some shelter so you don't get pelted by flying fruit and worry about making lemonade later.

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i once bought a timeshare, guess what happened? i'm broke

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What does it take to make the best anti-joke ever? not this

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Why does it get hot after a basketball game? Because of the crowd all breathing out carbon dioxide and the high level of activity generating excess body heat.

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A black man was walking down the street wearing a ski mask. It was cold outside.

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Why did the pedophile go to the park? He lost his dog.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has Stevie Wonder.

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What's worse than seeing Helen Keller behind the wheel of a car? Being run over by Helen Keller.

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What is the worst gift a child can get? a gift

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why do the jewish guy and italian girl talk? i dont know why any decent minded italian would talk to a jew so i don't know.

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what is the difference between a pile of dead babies and a cadilac. a cadilac is something i want

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What can fit between breasts? Is long? And gets hard when you jerk it? A seatbelt.

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Whats the difference between a truck full of bowling balls and a truck full of dead babies? You can't unload one with a pitchfork

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What's worse than having AIDS? A piano falling on your left middle finger.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Slowly being tortured to death.

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Whats sadder than 20 dead babies nailed to a tree? The Parents...

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What is red and fluffy?... Your teddy bear covered in blood...

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what did the jew get for Christmas? cancer. and aids

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What did Little Tommy get for chirstmas? An explanation that Santa is a lie.

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He who laughs last gathers no moss.

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So I was flirting with a girl at a bar the other day when this huge black guy walks up and says "Hey honey". I realized that I still had some un-addressed prejudices in me as he shook my hand, pointed out that it was a mistake anyone could make, and introduced me to a girl he had met at the college he works at.

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Oh you have herpes? yeah, there's an app for that.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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