Q:Whats the difference between Glenn Close and a black widow? A:one is a person, the other is a species of spider.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

whore whore whore whore whore whore whore whore whore whroe whore whore whore whroe

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What's black, white, and red all over?? A penguin that just got hit by a truck and is now struggling to live.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Whats 9 plus 10? 19

thumb_up thumb_down -10

No smoking No eating No drinking On this bus Didn't say anything about sniffing

thumb_up thumb_down -10

while in iraq i bought a brand new iphone from the black market...it was only $250....its was doing fantastic until i got a text...i herd a loud beeping noise and the it exploded in my pocket and now i no longer have a penis.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

"i once had a rabbit named socks.he was a funny little fellow until one day he got over excited and...well..." "did he...i mean..you know..did he...?" "what?lose a claw,throw up, sit in a pan of warm water until he calmed down?" "yeah! :)" "yes...but then he died."

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Q: why did the dog fall down the stairs? A: Because I pushed him down.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A duck walks into a bar. The bartender says what will it be? The duck replies "lemonade!"

thumb_up thumb_down -12

When you aren't feeling well, you should see a doctor like this: https://encrypted-tbn2.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcS5u4lryU5PzmLUKCGEKZgDWMeQ_96VLEKFGu7Wvk-4M7UXHkOXBw

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What's green and has wheels? Grass I lied about the wheels

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Q: Why did the chicken cross the street? A: Because that was the direction it was headed.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

HAHAHAHAHAHA.....shut up your joke isn't better.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why do dinosaurs have no friends? Because they are all dead

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What did the coat say to the dog? Nothing, the coat was inanimate

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Knock knock Who's there Joe Aids who's?

thumb_up thumb_down -18

The funniest thing happened in my dream last night, i dreamed that banks would stop ripping people off and start treating people like humans. How wierd is that :D

thumb_up thumb_down -20

why did the fat woman die? ... because she tried to commit suicide and the ceiling collapsed on her.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

hows your wife she died 7 years ago really mine too

thumb_up thumb_down -22

why did the 42 inch plasma screen blow-up 6 hours before the england match ? because it knows .

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Going up to someone and saying, "my mom is dead and my dad tryd killing himself, can i have a ride home?"

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Roses are red Violets are blue I tryed to hang myself But my neck qad to fat

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Q: What do you call cheese that isn't yours? A: Cheese.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

The last head of Satan, is oh but what you blamed upon Your faults, Your sins. The thoughts of Madness written here, yet potent enough to cloud Your thoughts.... Wait not forever children of man, as eternity is at its peak, the false prophet IS AMONGST US! But what side is he on? The last ditch attempt to protect humanity from a raging jealous vengeful God? Say it is not so! Say that darkness is not the only thing standing against you and eternal damnation... ...Yet you killed his only true child, you stole his name, his essence... Even his Identity... ...Even the Angels white are powerless to stop him, Your maker, Your true maker, for what is the grief of the holy, from which you took his only son... ...As you celebrate once and once anew... :...Merry CHRISTmas, to all of those of you all now left behind... Celebrate it well, as before the world reaches 2017, is where it all ends...

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops