Why did the bird fall out of the sky? It had no wings.

A mans wife gets pregnant after he has a visectomy... She was artificially inseminated using sperm he froze before the operation

What did one lawyer say to the other? Your son's coming to my son's birthday party, right?

Wanna know what I don't get? I was gonna say yo face, but that would be mean.

there was once a time before tht time when there wasnt bonerss there were erectionss CC

A blonde walks into a bar. The bartender says, "What're you drinking?" The blonde says, "Nothing yet. That's why I'm in a bar. But your lack of basic observation skills is disturbing."

A black, Kenyan man enters a race. He comes in second to last as he didn't practice as much as the other contestants.

What's orange and fluffy? Orange Fluff

I just got robbed by an invisible man!!!!

What do you call a black man holding a stone with bloody hands A hard working stone mason

Roses are red Violets are blue Sugar is sweet You have pancreatic cancer

Everytime God shuts a door, he opens a window... ...But I am the Goddamn locksmith!

What is the difference between a pizza and a Jew?

Roses are red, violets are blue, suck my tip and call me Regi.

Knock Knock. Who's there? A cannibal. What? You are about to die and be eaten. Asshole! i will murder you first!

Why did the lion get lost? Because the jungle is massive

How did the old man die? His family locked him in the basement and then burned the house

A rat and a pig rape a puppy. Hey, that's just life.

Why aren't there Olympics in Mexico? Idk Because everyone that can run jump or swim are already across the boarder.

What did Aladin say to Mulan? Nothing. Although they are both Disney characters, they never appear in the same film, and therefore never communicate.

How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb? One. Though if the ladder is rickety and she needs someone to steady it for her, two.

Your parents shouldn't have met. I was thinking that as I contemplated suicide.

Why did a kid throw a clock out the window? Because he was adopted

A priest and a Rabbi walk into a bar, but they're wearing normal people clothes, so no one notices or says anything funny.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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