Repeat after me: Silk, Silk, Silk, What's the square root of 465?

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Q: What would have been the easiest way to stop the second world war without killing anyone? A: Paid Hitler for his art.

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Who's the slut of the alphabet? C.

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What's worse than getting punched in the balls? Many things inflict more pain than that

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Your dad must be a drug dealer because I saw him in your kitchen snorting cocaine

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whats the difference between a mexican and a bench? a mexican has elbows.

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Roses are red, violets blue, um... that's all i got.

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Q how do you feel? A with a series of nerve endings, that send signals to my brain

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Take part of what?

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Oh, go away

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Why did the dinosaurs become extinct? Because they wanted to.

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What do you call a white sheep with no legs? A cloud What do you call a black sheep with no legs? A shit.

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A black man and a mexican man are in a car. Who is driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. The mexican, Alex, had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. Rain had suddenly come upon them and a passing off-duty police officer had picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful rest of their trip. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months after their return John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

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Q. What's cold and has no feelings? A. A pole

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What looks like mud, smells like mud and eats mud? An African

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A rabbi walks into a bar mitzwa.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs water skiing? An anchor

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What should you never give to your friends as a wedding present? An old plastic bag full of rubbish.

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What did the hitler youth kid get for Christmas? An easy bake oven and a G.I. Jew.

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"Knock, Knock." "Who's There?" "Banana."

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If you see a person falling down your balcony, Say cya later!

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You want some cake? Sure! Okay, go buy the ingridients and bake me some. YAY!

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Comes a giraffe on a scooter to the hospital and asks: 'can I have some flour?'.

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What's black and white and red all over. Nothing, that's a contradiction.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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