A homeless guy walked up to me and said "Any change?", to which I replied, "Nope, your still homeless". We laughed and laughed. The he stabbed me.

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What is E.T. short For? So he can fit on ship

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your friend: i did ur mom you: jokes on u my moms gross friend:.....

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Know what im sayin'? No but im wearing pants

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A woman walks into a bar.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? I am. I am who? You are you.

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Why couldn't the cat drink it's milk? Because it didn't have a face.

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Why did Michael Jackson retire from basketball? Michael Jackson never played basketball, but was nonetheless one of the most successful musicians to ever live.

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I'm a burrito... With a big shirt.

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Is it closer to Minneapolis, or by bus?

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why did the dead baby cross the road? it was stapled to the chicken

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Why did the woman make so many sandwiches? She was a mother catering for her child's sporting event.

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Why was the unemployed dolphin trainer so sad? His life has no purpoise. In an unrelated topic, how is he unemployed id he is a dolphin trainer?

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Why did the man eat his own shoe? Because it was a tissue box.

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What does Osama Bin Laden and the typical Western man have in common? Extensively modern p.o.r.n-o collections.

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So I was flirting with a girl at a bar the other day when this huge black guy walks up and says "Hey honey". I realized that I still had some un-addressed prejudices in me as he shook my hand, pointed out that it was a mistake anyone could make, and introduced me to a girl he had met at the college he works at.

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What did the black guy get for Christmas? (In 1938) A bruise from the Klu Klux Klan.

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Pilot: We need to lighten the load of this plane Italian: I'll throw out these pizzas, there are too many of them in my country Mexican: I will throw out these tacos, there are just too many of them in my country The american stares in horror at the two men, the pizza and tacos were their only food and they were lost in the Himalayas.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Silence. Silence who? No, I meant there was silence, I didn't really say anything. Oh, OK. But seriously, who's there?

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A drunk walks out of a bar gets in his car and proceeds to drive home the driver passed out at the wheel swerved in the wrong lane and smashed the car of the Jefferson family a young family of 4, the Jefferson family's car exploded into flames while the drunk sat back laughed and rubbed the wound on his head

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? "Get in the car."

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Why was this German dude's water bill so high this month? Because there were thirty dead Jews in his shower. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

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Did you know that Claire Seiter likes to drinkapplseiter? No. Oh well she does..

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A man walks into a bar, drinks, then leaves the bar.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops