How do you make a retard make a sound like a dog? Douse him in gasoline and light him on fire. WOOF!

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Q: How much old could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck Wood A:10.6 cubic metes

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What happened to the alcoholic man that decided to never drink ever again? He died of thirst. Moral: Alcohol was the only available liquid in this twilight zone... Anti anti joke

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What does DNA stand for? The National Dyslexic Association

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Whats funnier than a baby in a jar? A baby in ten jars.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

A man walks in to a bar, wakes up the next morning with the news that they have found a cancerous tumor in his neck.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

who is gay wit mon james cornish

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Knock knock. ... Knock knock. ... Knock knock. ... The FedEx man leaves, realizing that no one was home, and continues on with his job.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

My mom was telling my brother how much it hurt when she stubbed her toe. He told her she should try child birth.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Do you know the difference between a dinosaur and a slice of bread? No. You're pretty stupid then.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What happend when they were 3 guys in the air? They were skydiving

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Why didn't the lttle boy fasten his seatbelt? It doesn't matter, it's too late now.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down +26

A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He was at Victoria's Secret and he wasn't watching where he was going.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What do you call a black pilot? A pilot, you racist.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

why couldn't the boy talk? Because he was dead

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why did the girl fall off of the swings? Because I threw a refrigerator at her.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What ryhmes with turtle? räpe

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Q: What do you call Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen. A: two things: Their names, and a doctor because they are both in need of a nutritionist.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What's small, black and at the top of a burning building? Oh shit - I forgot my baby

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What's red and bad for your teeth? a brick.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why couldn't the man make it to work? Because as he was leaving his apartment, he saw a gruesome murder on the street that was part of an ever-growing and evolving genocide. Quickly following this, he broke down into psychological turmoil and wandered aimlessly through the streets until he eventually reached a forest, where he was taken in by a wild boar and raised to believe in boar-gods. The man died peacefully while planting potatoes.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What did the boy with no legs get for Christmas? A nice sweater.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Inbreeding is really funny if you think about...

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops