"knock, knock" "who is there?" Gestapo

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what do you call a man with no arms or legs? numerous abusive terms as you kickk him to death.

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There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

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A cheetah walks into a bar. The bartender refuses to serve re cheetah, as cheetahs are an endangered species and does not want to risk the cheetah succumbing to alcohol poisoning.

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An Asian walks into a bar with his girlfriend He proceeds to buy himself and her food Pays Then leaves

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How many NRA members does it take to change a lightbulb? MORE GUNS!

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how do you wake up lady gaga? you throw her on the ground.

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How many blonde chicks does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Two. One to set the house on fire, and the other to call 119.

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What's worse than one bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? The holocaust? What's worse than the holocaust? Three bee stings.

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Why is the turkey always full? Because he is stuffed.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have amnesia HOW THE HELL DID I GET HERE?!?

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? I've lost my tractor!

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Your mom is so fat, I do not see how she can possibly wipe effectively.

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What did thirty starving Jews fight for on the train ride to Birkenau? A crumb. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

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HOREY SHIT!! OMFG!! I win? Yeah I think so.. Wait. Why am I talking to myself.. Aww not again.. My doctor warned me about this.. D:

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Did you hear about that anthony weiner guy. He is very depressed, and your mother has cancer.

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In 2030, what will most people be doing for a living? Using food stamps.

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How did the carpenter do on his exam? Poorly so his parents killed him.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree, because it was dead. why did the second monkey fall out of the tree, becuase it was dead. why did the third monkey fall out of the tree, because he thought it was a game!

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whats worse than walking in to the doctors office and he says you got aids heaps of stuff can be worse but haha you got aids

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Three men walked into a bar. You'd think one of them would of ducked?

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Yo mommas so fat We are terribly concerned about her health

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Why did the little boy fall off the swing? He had no arms

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What did the mute guy say to the deaf guy? Hi. He said it in sign language.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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