Q. How many men did it take to build a wall? A. None, the wall is already built.

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Got in a Taxi and the driver said "You'll never guess who i had in the back of my cab the other day". I said "It's probably pointless me trying to guess then ".

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Why is it OK to make fun of a deaf person? Because they can't hear.

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How does Lady Gaga like her meat? Cooked until it reaches an internal temperature of 180 degrees Fahrenheit to lower the risk of contracting diseases such as salmonella.

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why cant little timmy ski? he was born without legs.

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What do you call a man whos had his arms ripped off in front of you? An ambulance, because with an injury such as this, you can die anywhere between 10 and 45 minutes

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Obesity runs in your family. To bad no one runs in your family.

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So God answered a paralyzed boy's prayer the other day...He said 'No'

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Why did they serve Swiss cheese at the church? It was lunchtime.

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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What goes in dry and comes out wet Gum

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What the difference between a black person and a piece of shit in a bucket? The bucket

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She loves me, she dosn't love me, she loves me, the girl walks up to the man and says, she doesn't love me

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Yo momma so fat, when she walks she wakes the dead -Ryan Vallee

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette were driving on a highway. The redhead asked the brunette, who had the map, which was the next exit. The blonde was better with maps so she took it and announced where to go. They made the exit and enjoyed a nice lunch.

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2 bald men are standing on an oval, one turns to the other and says "leukemia."

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Knock knock Fuck off!

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Why did the girl scream? She was being raped.

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what's body surfing? sounds dumb.

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Your momma is so ugly... Yeah, yeah, yeah my momma's ugly, but guess what, at least I'm not an orphan asshole.

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How much wood can a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? The Holocaust

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hey i just met you and this is crazy but here is my gun so get in the van

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what is worse than a hole in your sock? Getting raped

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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