Whats brown a sticky, shit

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What did the robot say to the child? Nothing, he malfunctioned and strangled him. Despite the authorities best efforts to free the kid, he was still strangled because robots are really strong. After killing the boy, the robot self destructed and leveled 5 city blocks everyone within the vicinity was killed.

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What? I didn't say anything. Yes you did.

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Lebron James got a new iPhone, but he has to keep it on vibrate because he doesn't have any rings.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was a turkey, idiot.

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alert('The Game')

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Your momma is so short, she needed my help to reach something off the top shelf.

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Man#1: Who's John? Man#2: John is John. Who else do you want him to be? Why do you ask stupid questions? Are you naturally this dumb? Do you like the questions I ask? Man#1: (Turns away as he is deeply offended by the man who rudely answered his question.)

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Why did the big refrigerator fall down the cheese Because i licked my own ear and it got scared and cheese for no raiSOnsD

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You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me!

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Q: Whats worst than the Holocaust A: If a second Holocaust happened, and then you found an apple in your apple

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The queen having a shit

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is this the krusty krab? no, this is patrick.

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What happens when you put four drunk clowns and eight sober clowns inside of a clown car? Nothing, because the clowns realized that it's dangerous to operate a vehicle while under the influence of alcohol and decides to call a taxi instead.

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whats red and looks like a bucket? a red bucket.

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SEX

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You know what the stupidest country in the world is? Equatorial Guinea

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A black man walks into a bar. The bartender says "I wont serve you." The black man says, "Why? Is it because of the color of my skin?" The bartender says, "No, its because your wearing a suit and on the front door it says no people in suits are allowed." So the black man took off his suit and was kindly served.

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What did the fish say after he swam into a wall? Dam

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What is green and red and is going super fast? A frog in a blender.

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You know what's good for shoulder pain? If you ice on for 20 minutes then off for 20 minutes repetitively three times a day

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knock knock. whos there? the police. we have news about your daughter. She has been tortured and raped and you will never see her again for the man that took her has taken her out of our jurisdiction.

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How do you stop the neighbors from calling the police when you play your music too loud? Kill them and use their bodies as noise insulation

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let me tell u a dirty joke a guy fell in the mud.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops