Q. What's the difference between a duck? A. An orange.

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Nah really, I start giggling like a dork whenever weird porn or whatever shows up on my computer, its just too weird. Fine ill use my glasses then, thanks for the comment by the way, I was really regretful for sending you that pic, but then again I did not have contacts then, nor did I want to photoshop anything.

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2 muffins were in the oven when one turned to the other and said. "Damn it's hot in here" The second muffin looked at him with a shocked expression and exclaims "She's burning the potatoes!"

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I saw 2 jews talking. I threw in a penny and watched them fight to the death. I did the same with 2 catholic preasts exept I threw in a baby boy

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Why did Jimmy drop his ice cream? Because he was hit by a bus Knock Knock Who's there? Not Jimmy -thatcooltyguy

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven's bigger.

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Why did the man drive a van? So he could keep the stuff he stole.

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Did you know that onions is the only food that makes you cry? Oh? Really? Positive. what if I threw a coconut at you're face. ...

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Hi... your father has testicular cancer and he will die in 2 months....

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A man goes to his doctor and says, "Help me, my wife thinks she's a chicken." The doctor recommends a nearby psychiatrist to analyze the wife's mental instability, and inevitably she is housed in an insane asylum. The husband commits suicide.

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What is similar about Michael Jackson and Walmart? Nothing they have nothing to do with each other

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When birds fly south for the winter they fly in a V formation. one side is always longer than the other. why is that? Because there are more birds on that side

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What's worse than the holocaust? The holocaust was one of the most terrible incidents in history there are very few things worse than.

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What do you call a Mexican guy in America? A Mexican American

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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How many Babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends how hard you throw them

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how do you get a 1 armed moron out of a tree? you wave

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Why did Dan fall of his bicycle? Because somebody threw a refrigerator at him.

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Put chromosomes in advertising. Because you know, Sex Cells

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An old bear-wrestler dies and finds himself at the pearly gates. Confused and at a loss for words due to the unfamiliar circumstance and lack of public toilets, he blurts out "Saint Peter, I presume?" but it was just the train conductor. "Ticket please." He searched his pockets and finally found the ticket. He wished he had a dog, but not a seeing-eye dog because people would assume he was blind. This story illustrates the importance of situational awareness, remembering which pocket you put your ticket in, and not forgetting to go before you leave because you don't know when you'll be able to find a restroom.

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Q) What did the Hobo get for Xmas? A) Nothing

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Knock knock Who's there? The bank. We've come to evict you from your house.

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Mario walks into a bar A yak walks into a bar An orange walks into a bar 30 men barf in a juicy yot

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What sound does a dead cat make? Nothing, it's dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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