Why was Helen Keller a bad driver? She was blind.

What's gay black & Jewish? The Ku Klux Klan

Why was a white man surrounded by black men crying? He was in a support group for black men with vitiligo, which destroys skin pigments.

What day is it today? It's "Jack Daniels Day" according to that guy with the shopping cart filled with kittens.

Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

why was the Jewish person accused of stealing money? because the police found his finger prints.

Roses are red violets are blue im a schizophrenic and i am too.

Name three similarities between racism and sexism I, S and M

Q: What's worse than ten babies tied to ten trees? A: One baby tied to ten trees.

What does a penguins wear on it's feet? Nothing penguins are incapable of wearing foot wear, also they do not have feet they are called 'flippers'.

Have you ever had Ethiopian food? ...Neither have they.

What is pink and fuzzy? Pink fuzz

Your mum is so fat that she finds trouble fitting through thinner doorways

What did Steven Hawking get for christmas? A bike.

Q: What would Martin Luther King Jr. be if he was white? A: Alive

What do you call a bunch black people falling off a cliff? A mudslide! What do you call a bunch of white people falling off a cliff? An avalanch!

why dont black people celebrate thanksgiving? kfc is closed on holidays

Two muffins are sitting in an oven. The first one turns to the second, and says nothing, because muffins can't talk. They then both die because the temperature in the oven was 370 degrees.

What is the way to a man's heart? Through his stomach. With a knife. Then then go up a little.

How many squirrels does it take to screw out a light bulb? None because squirrels lack the strength and mind set to screw out a light bulb.

How do you get a black man out of a tree? You provide him with a ladder of varying length depending on his height in the tree and hold the ladder to ensure that it is stable and safe while he is climbing down. If he his very high in the tree then it may be helpful to call the fire department for assistance in getting him down.

Why was the black kid in the AP Calculus classroom? Because he was a very driven student, who studied hard so that he could attend a good University and build a good life for himself and his family.

Until further notice Penn State's take your child to work day has been canceled.

Why is a cookie like a jellyfish? Because it has no bones. (Contributed by my 4-year old boy)

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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