What's black, white, and red all over?? A penguin that just got hit by a truck and is now struggling to live.

A blonde walks into a bar, and hit it head on, she is now in the hospital grasping for her life but the threatening grips of hell keep pulling her into the wretched plains of fiery wrath and despair... -Avery Vartanian

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Suzie.

What more fun than a barrel full of monkeys? A barrel of dead babies

Why did the man crossed the busy road? Because he was sick of life.

Knock Knock. Who`s there? Hadooouuuuuuu! Hadou who? KEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEN! PERFECT!!! Perfect Bonus: 38493483948394839483984 Skill 0000000 Your life 0 Bonus 9001

Why to lawyers wear neckties? It's part of the uniform.

Want to hear a funny story? So, these to kids have cancer...

Why did the chicken cross the road? ... So he didn't get Mono from Janelle.

A jew walks into a bar He receives a phone call and promptly leaves

Where were guinea pigs created? Probably in Guinea Land or something.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a registered sex offender in five states.

Her Majesty's Government of the United Kingdom of Great Britain

What do a bike and a duck have in common? They both have handlebars except for the duck.

Man 1: is that boy high? Man 2: No. He has down syndrome

Roses are red, Violets are purple.

What's the difference between a guitar and a fish? Fish are living organisms and guitars are instruments used for people's entertainment

You're tearing apart, Lisa!

three men walked into a bar, two walked out... One walked into a metal pole and died

What did the Farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my tractor?"

If John had 4 apples and gave 2 to Mary, what is the circumference of the sun?

Q. What you call a Guy with no arms an no legs in the water? A. Bob

Well, I'm naked so I'm going to go.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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