A man walks into a bar and is shot in the face

I feel like am motherf***ing stuck in this duck and it makes me wana quack like what the f**k is THAT!

How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Make hurtful and upsetting remarks about her person.

Why couldn't the pirate watch the violent movie? Because pirates died along time ago

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms.

DON'T OPEN IT IT'S PANDORA'S BOX!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Why do dinosaurs have no friends? Because they are dead

"Knock knock" "Who's there?" "Fairy floss" "Fairy floss who?" "I'm sugar coating your Cancer diagnoses"

So, would you like provolone or mozzarella with that? Yes.

What's big, white, and kills you if it falls out of a tree. A Fridge

I love animals . But the ASPCA soon put a stop to that .

Ask me if I'm a tree..... "are you a tree?" No.

What's brown and slimy? brown slime

Why did Suzy fall of the swing? She didn't have arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Suzy.

What's brown and rhymes with poop? Dr. Dre.

what did the dog say to the cat? nothing cause animals dont talk.

Loperson

Why do midgets laugh when they run? The grass tickles their balls.

Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

Where did the cow go? To the slaughter house!!!

Q:Why don't black people go on cruises? A:They already fell for that trick once.

what is funnier than a apple? a talking apple

What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

Knock know! Who's there? Aids! Aids who? Aids! Aids who? Orange! Orange who? Orange you glad I'm not aids!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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