What ryhmes with turtle rape

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Q: Do you know what you can make when you have enough cents? A: Dollars

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What did the Liver say to the Heart? Nothing, Organs can't talk

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What did one jobless cancer cell say to the other? Lets go get Jobs.

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Why was Eight in court? He was involved in Nine's horrifying disappearance.

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Why did Sara fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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You heard now that you can not only bet safe at net casinos, but also win safely? Win safely? The hell does that mean? You mean you could win unsafely before? Like the betting casino crashing after you win a million? Moral: That crap is even less moral than I am ffs! Now they give you like 5000 game bucks free just to get you addicted.

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put my cock in your mouth. Submitted by Arsha K.

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What did the snoop dog have for breakfast? Weed

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How do you make a clown stop laughing? Hit him in the face with an ax.

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

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roses are red , violets are blue, lick my dick , or lick my dick

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he has two legs

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what do you call a brown man that has been repeatedly shanked and has been fucked up the arse by 10 Rag heads in one night and thrown in a well to slowly and painfully die? Lloyd.

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How did the mexican die while fixing a lightbulb? He fell off the ladder.

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why did the baby cross the road? he was stapled to the chicken

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Have you heard about the constipated mathematician? He worked his problems out with a pencil... It was a #2 pencil

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What's the opposite of Christopher Walkins? Christopher Reeves.

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Three kids are playing on the swings. One of the kids falls off. He then gets up, gets back on the swing and continues playing.

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Q: Why is grass green? A: I painted it.

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- what do u call a dead black person a problem - what do u call a lot of dead black people a big problem - what do you call a mass killing of all black people. genocide

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"Imagine a World Without Free Knowledge" -I'm not imagining, thanks Wikipedia!

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Why did the Soviet plane crash? It was joseph Stallin in the air.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead get pulled over. The cop says "Yuck!" Then shoots the redhead because red hair is disgusting.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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