A Chinese man, a Mexican man, and an American man are all on a plane in-flight when the pilot screams over the intercom, "We are two pounds over weight! The plane is going down unless you all throw off useless things that have no value in your countries!" The Chinese man throws out a pair of chopsticks and an egg roll and says, "I have too many of those in my country." The Mexican does the same with a taco and sombrero, repeating, "I have too many of those in my country." The American looks around his items pondering what things are too common in the USA. He locks his eyes on the Mexican. The other passengers are shocked as the American throws off a hamburger and a football.

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What did the black man do when he found a bucket full of KFC chicken on the ground? He promptly looked around for anyone who might have bought it. After searching around, with no takers, he ate some of the chicken and saved the rest. He brought it back to his apartment and left it in his fridge, so he may later eat it as leftovers.

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What do men like most of all? Let's not lie, BOOBIES!

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Girl:Do you wanna hear a joke? Boy:Sure... Girl: jesus loves you

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What did the man say when he was stabbed on the street? Nothing, because he died.

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A ham sandwich walks into a bar, bartender says "We don't serve food here."

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Im a Jew, Fart yourself.

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Knock knock. Who's there? It's me. Oh, come on in. Thanks.

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roses are red,violets are blue,faces like yours belong in a zoo,but don't worry i'll be there to,not in a cage but laughing at you!

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What is lil Wayne's real name? Dwayne micheal carter jr.

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What do you say to a cat with a helmet on? Silly cat, you rhyme with hat but you shouldn't wear one.

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A.Because that's where it wanted to go.

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What did the priest do to the little crying boy in an enclosed room? He forgave the boy for his sins. Then he raped him.

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What did the cow say to the chicken crossing the road? Moo

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Knock knock! Who's there? Alzheimer's Alzheimer's who? To get to the other side!

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What did the doctor say to the minority, parapalegic after he barely escaped a fire alive? You just got burned!!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. It was a footless chicken.

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What's the difference between ?2 and and 74^3? ?-405242.585786

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Real Joke: The US Air Force operates Seymour Johnson Air Force Base. It is named for a seaman. Go look it up.

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What's a good joke? France going to war and winning.

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You know what's funny? You can't spell manslaughter without laughter.

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Why did the puppy get shot? It lived in Detroit.

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-What's sad about four black guys driving off a cliff? -They were my friends.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Rape

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops