The little girl asks her father "Daddy why is santa fat?" "you have to exist to lose weight" he answered

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How do you make a plumer cry? Kill his family

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What did Kane Larkin get on his birthday? Cancer...

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What looks like half an Apple? The other half.

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why did the dog cross the street? because it saw a squirrel

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Knock knock Who's there? Chicken Chicken who? I can't believe you're talking to a chicken

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What do you call a dear with no eyes? A no-idear

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That is so fetch

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Why did Lisa fall of the swing? Cause she had no arms... A: Knock Knock B: Whos there? A: Definitely not Lisa....

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What did the farmer say to the chicken? Nothing, the farmer was arrested for having sex with a chicken.

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What do you call a black guy who gives out change? A cashier.

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a charmander decided to take a swim a.w. j.p.

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What would George Washington be doing if he was alive today? Scratching and screaming at the bottom of his coffin.

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Why was the penguin popular? He cuts himself.

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A grasshopper walks into a bar. The bartender says "Hey, we named a drink after you!". The grasshopper says "What, Dave?"

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A tiger walks into bar. He orders a drink and leaves. The tiger's name was Tony the tiger," It was just a man wearing a costume for the cereal company.

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What did peter griffin say to the black guy? Oh you are black.

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Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

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Why was the blonde fired from her job at the M&M's factory? Her Masters Degree in electrical engineering made her overqualified for the position she had.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I'm locked in someone's basement, Please help me.

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what is worse than the holocaust. interracial relationship, cough..... oli

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What's a Hillbilly's last words? I won't be here much longer, so take care of the kids. I love you.

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Why are female badgers more attracted to the smell of cheese than male badgers? I don't know. Ask Bill Snodgrass

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Want to hear a joke? ...you're straight.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops