What's the difference between an orange? A bicycle because a vest doesn't have any sleeves.

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Why did the kid jump? He didn't.

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? Oh, And one of them has a penis.

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i'm not random but cheese does get a bit purple if you leave it in your laptop then the battery dies and the sun expands and kills every dodo alive even though they're extinct but that not the point

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YOU MEAN SHE ACTUALLY EVER LIKED ME? WOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH! Anyway, tell her to contact me here, during the number of letters up there divided by a certain number you got over there, minus the letters here subtracted with the VEEEEEEERY same ammoooouuuuunt... Moral: God I need to invent a code system that makes me sound less like Jim Carrey on crack...

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An English ship lands in the New World and offers to trade with the natives. The ship actually carried foreign diseases that the natives had no immunity to, and they all died.

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I've been reading these for the past hour and you guys are just out right terrible! -Sarah

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What do you get when you cross a Lion and a Shark? You would likely get trouble, seeing as its both animals are quite dangerous and crossing even one of them is ill advised.

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What did the orphan do on Mother's Day? He went to the cemetery

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Roses are red Violets are red I'm bleeding quite profusely and should probably go to the hospital.

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A blind man walks into a bar. He backs up, takes two steps to the right, and walks around the bar rubbing his forehead.

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How much does a polar bear weigh? About 800 pounds

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How many members of Coldplay can you fit in a mini? 4, as there are 4 members of Coldplay.

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What is both bold and brash? Fox

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How did Bill Framex die? He didn't because he isn't real.

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What is the difference between a feminist and a gun? A gun only has one trigger

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What did the little black boy get for Christmas? Hopefully something nice.

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Why did the Bruins win against the Flyers? ....they had goal tending.

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What's the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? The wheelchair.

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Did you hear about the dyslexic atheist? He didn't believe in santa.

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what do you call when a penis is inside a vagina? sex

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What green and eats rocks? Grass, i lied about the rocks

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What did the man in the mirror say to the other man The Same F****** Thing!!

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What do you call a black man walking down the street? Danger Approaching

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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