Roses are bald Violets are bald You are bald I think you have cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?". The horse responds "I have cancer"

thumb_up thumb_down -16

why did the chicken cross the road? it didnt it got hit by a bus.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What did the girl say to the boy? You are a boy.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Your life

thumb_up thumb_down -16

if you're jesus and you know it, clap your hands

thumb_up thumb_down -16

You're so ugly, when yo' mama dropped you off at school, she kissed your forehead and called you beautiful.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

If boobs are round. And so are balls. Then i just cant figure out why the sky is blue?

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Magic! Well not really, you see, people that are stressed have the tendency to remain far longer into the state of hypnosis because their body conciously and subconciously (I am typoing it, but I cant bother to type it correctly fuck it) seek out the state of peace that hypnosis gives more often. Anyway, I know another thing that helps relieve stress, cough... Now, did you know that if you push your nose upwards slightly, you will feel a finger between your legs? its because nerve endings are connected that way, give it a go.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because, 32!

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What did you the blonde death amuptee child get for Christmas? Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Flawed genetics? I am just sad, but then again I am a crybaby, mind sharing a bit more with me? I mean you wont call me wont you? You are not keeping me a secret from anyone right?

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Laughter and joy... You are really sweet you know.. Excuuuse me princess! But Like Mickey Mouse never changed... From a Potato peeler to some fuckup private detective in a trenchcoat. So tell me, what character did Walt Disney draw before Mickey Mouse?

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why did Timmy fall off his swing? The Holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Whats worse than losing your phone? Buying a new one and then losing that

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What's the difference between a sewer pipe and a French fry? A lot

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was a woman.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Thats the magic of Moral Man, I do not make people my bitches, they curl up and do it all for me. Moral: HEEEEEY BITCHEEEEEES! WAZZAAAAP!

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Have you heard of that new jewish car? No, have you? No.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

the blue man livedin the blue house the black man in the black house the white man in the white house but who lived in the white house ,not the white man barack obama

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What's the difference between a plum and a rabbit? They're both purple, except for the rabbit.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

what did the rapist say to the girl? get in the van

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Q: What is red and green and goes 100/mph? A: A frog in a blender

thumb_up thumb_down -18

When geese migrate, why is one side of the V longer than the other? There are more birds on that side.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops