What name does Steve Bartman go by Now? Steve Bartman, but he just hides all day trying not to be killed.

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What do you call a college student who never studies? An irresponsible person

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What did the boy with cancer, no arms, and no legs get for his birthday? Nothing he was dead.

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how do you make a plumber cry? you kill his family!

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69

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whats better than 7 babies in one trash can 1 baby in 7 trash cans

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What is similar about a white person and a white fence? Mexicans jump them.

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What do you call putting a toad in the microwave? Animal cruelty.

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A man was driving down the road and was swerving, a cop stops him and asks him to walk in a straight line, believing him to be drunk. The man replies "I can't, I've been blind since I was a child."

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what do you call an icy road? dangerous.

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Q.Why did the dinosaur cross the road? A.Because chickens weren't invented then.

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I have a very serious problem with my narcolepsy. I occasionalolahdf;honainbirgnipqgierngiaqbhgpqruiph

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What did the pitcher say to the batter who hit the ball very far? Wow, you hit that ball very far.

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Blonde Girl: Why is this green-painted man throwing forks at me?! Green-Painted Man: It is confusing you, no?

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A black man walks into a bar. The bartender says, "We don't serve you kind here." The black man says, "Is it because I'm black?" The bartender replies, "Yes."

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When life gives you lemons you are like "how did I get these lemons?"

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Trees are red, FUCK, MY GARDEN IS ON FIRE!

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even a blind squirrel finds a nut every now and then. but has a high probability of getting hit by a car and slowly dying from crushed limbs

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Q: What do you call a real joke on anti joke A: Someone obviously don't understand the concept of this website

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A man walks into a bar, little did he know it was a gay bar and a few of the regulars were drinking and got overly aggressive the unaware man was then forced into the bathroom and raped by the aggressive gay lovers

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An Englishman, a Scotsman, an Irishman, a Welshman, a Latvian, a Turk, a German, an Indian, several Americans (including a southerner [but certainly not a redneck!], a New Englander, and a Californian), an Argentinian, a Dane, an Australian, a Slovakian, an Egyptian, a Japanese, a Moroccan, a Frenchman, a New Zealander, a Spaniard, a Russian, a Guatemalan, a Colombian, a Pakistani, a Malaysian, a Croatian, a Uzbek, a Cypriot, a Pole, a Lithuanian, a Chinese, a Sri Lankan, a Lebanese, a Cayman Islander, a Ugandan, a Vietnamese, a Korean, a Uraguayan, a Czech, an Icelander, a Mexican, a Finn, a Honduran, a Panamanian, an Andorran, an Israeli, a Venezuelan, a Fijian, a Peruvian, an Estonian, a Brazilian, a Portuguese, a Liechtensteiner, a Mongolian, a Hungarian, a Canadian, a Moldovan, a Haitian, a Norfolk Islander, a Macedonian, a Bolivian, a Cook Islander, a Tajikistani, a Samoan, an Armenian, a Aruban, an Albanian, a Greenlander, a Micronesian, a Virgin Islander, a Georgian, a Bahamanian, a Belarusian, a Cuban, a Tongan, a Cambodian, a Qatari, an Azerbaijani, a Romanian, a Chilean, a Kyrgyzstani, a Jamaican, a Filipino, a Ukrainian, a Dutchman, a Taiwanese, an Ecuadorian, a Costa Rican, a Swede, a Bulgarian, a Serb, a Swiss, a Greek, a Belgian, a Singaporean, an Italian, a Norwegian and 47-53 Africans walk into a fine restaurant. Fortunately," said the snooty maître d', "we'll let you come in without a Thai.

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Q.What do you call a friend with benefits? A. a buck fuddy.

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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this last joke was a correction to the other one

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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