Why did the hooker cross the road? Because was a prostitute

Why did the man die? A fridge fell on him.

Why did jasmine drop her shopping? And no its not because she did'nt have arms infact she did have arms she just did'nt have any hands

life is like a penis, short but feels long when it's hard.

what do u call a blonde in the libary? alexandra wallace

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Penis

how many jews fit in an oven? none, its illegal to put a person in an oven....

Why is my son hungry? Because he didn't eat lunch.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Your mom.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. I cut off his leg.

what’s worse than 12 dead babies in one trash can? one dead baby in 12 trash cans

What's worse than finding ants in your kitchen? A truckload of dead babies.

what is the difference between a white woman and a black woman.. i raped the black one

What do you call a fly with no wings? Disabled

What smells like bananas but is invisible? Monkey farts

Knock Knock Who’s there? Tom Tom who? Tom Pearson? Oh Tom, I wasn’t expecting you til 3pm, please come in.

What do you get when ned puts toast in the toaster? A fucking massive sperm whale.

What's the most common way to become mentally challenged? Getting hit by a shovel a couple times

What did the blind man say to his teacher? Nothing, blind people can't talk.

I like my women like I like my pancakes: Flipped over, inanimate, motionless, and covered in my syrup.

whats worth than finding half a dead worm in your apple getting rapped by your step dad

What do you call a snooker cue that only hits stripes? Anything you want, it can't hear you.

Kitana vs Shao Kahn. Kitana: HIAHIAHIAHIA...etc Kahn: You weak pathetic whor... OARGH! Kahn: FINISH ME!!! Kitana: Dad? Again? Okay the last time then... Kahn: I just addopted you you FUC... Oargh Oargh Oargh Oargh Oargh... OOF!! OFF!! OFF!! OFF! Kitana: *slurp okay no more for you I am uh... full, seriously, Ill explode or some other Fatality... Woody Allenality... Kahn: Kontinue? (press start to kontinue free play mode)

why was 6 afraid of 9? because 7 ate 9 and 6 is afraid of ghosts

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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