Excuse me. Oh, would you mind hitting the 15th floor button for me? Thanks.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the chicken cross the road? To commit suicide thus getting to the other side(hell/heaven)

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Mary had a little lamb Little lamb Mary had a little lamb That Mary wanted to blow Because Mary was into beastiality

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How many like does it take to get to the Tootsie Roll center of a Tootsie Pop? As many as it takes.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What is worse than braking a fingernail, Learing that a clown raped your entire family

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Have you ever had Ethiopian food? No? Neither have they.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Two fish in a tank one said "How do you drive this thing?"

thumb_up thumb_down -2

People with Alzheimers will not remember this joke

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What did the farmer say when he couldnt find his tractor? "Wheres my tractor?"

thumb_up thumb_down -2

An elephant stomped on a mouse. What did the mouse say? Nothing, the mouse was incapable of speech due to the elephants actions.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Something strange in you're neighborhood. Who you gonna call? The police.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why do black people have nightmares? Because we killed the only one with a dream.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How does an elephant climb a cliff who cares

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What did the cannibal do after he dumped his girlfriend........... Wiped his ass

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What did the orphan get for christmas........Cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Hey diddle diddle, the cat and the fiddle, the cow jumped over the salamander, macaroni and cheese.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

why didn't the chicken cross the road... because it got hit by a truck

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the black man steal the mountain bike? He didn't. He purchased and payed for the mountain bike.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How do you steal candy from a baby? You ask nicely.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

5 Italian guys from Long Island

thumb_up thumb_down -2

what's the difference between a duck?

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A horse shits himself SHITLESS!

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How do you get a tissue to dance. You don't.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops