What's more dangerous, a big rock or a small one? It doesn't matter. You can blame my mom for having me.

#IsaiahAfterAD&B

Why couldnt the girl ride her bike? becuase she was dreaming she actually doesnt have a bike her family is poor in these hard economic times.

What's worse then getting a broken bone? A large marsupial charging at you with vicious speed

What is green and has wheels???? Yo mamma on a Wednesday.

What have the TV programmes Shameless, The Jeremy Kyle Show and Benidorm all have in common? They are all examples of modern British society

sandwich. roller coaster. brain sprout. cholera, meander. time. rivet.porcupine. mayonaise. frying. x-ray forever.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

what did the postman say to the dog, nothing he doesnt speak dog....... but his mother in law does.

Why did Johnny fall off his bike? His father never taught him how to ride one as he was an abusive alcoholic who abandoned Johnny's mother when Johnny was 3, so he is not very good at riding bikes.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, it was kind of by chance that it crossed the road and what is the big deal lots of animals cross the road. For example possums, squirrels, deer, raccoons, cats, dogs, rabbits do pretty often too it's weird because sometimes more rabbits cross the road on Easter I don't know if that's just me though, chipmunks, bears, over in Africa probably tigers and lions cross those roads.

Who has two thumbs and gets to go home tomorrow? Well, not your son. He's in a persistent vegetative state and we had to amputate both of his arms.

People with cancer.

Roses are yellow Violets are carpet.. Get it...?

Grandpa loved a good joke, he died laughing. The doctor said it was a severe stroke probably brought on by smoking aggravated by high cholesterol and high blood pressure.

what do you call a mexican being baptized? a mexican becoming christian.

what are the best kind of bees none they sting and hurt like hell

What did the tractor say when he lost his farmer? Where's my farmer??????

Testicles.

How many dead body can you hide in a hole? 100. Forget the fat guy

What do you get when you come across a blonde. Depression, because you want to do her, but you know that will never happen cause you spend to much time sitting on your ass looking at anti-jokes.

Why does Garrett have a small penis? He is not old enough to buy extenze.

roses are red violets are blue cookie monster is gonna eat you big bird is yellow you look mellow dont forget elmo to

Why are black people so good at basketball? They practice.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...