What do you get when you throw a white hat in the red sea? A wet hat.

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What is Alqueida's favorite football team? The New York Jets.

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What did the astronaut say at AA? Alcohol is ruining my life.

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why did Lucy fall down? she got hit with a hammer

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what did one deer say to the other? nothing, he was shot during hunting season.

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I'd like to make a withdraw

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The farmer was depressed about the low business and farmer's economy, so he poured gasoline all over himself and lit a match. The barn burned down and the chicken was the only survivor.

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What's black, white, and red all over? That could describe any number of objects.

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- Knock, knock. - Who's there? - Immigration.

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How do you turn that frown upside down? You move many muscles in your face.

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chuck norris does not know how to use a plunger.

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What's the best part of twenty one year old's? Their bodies have matured enough that the U.S. government deems it safe for them to consume alcoholic beverages with proper I.D.

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It's not just a boulder. It's a rock! A rooooocckk!

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How did the boy fall off the swing? He got hit by a fridge

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A blind man walks into a deaf woman. He tries to apologize but she can't hear him.

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A Irish leaves and bump in to a really tall the Irish sorry boss

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What did Chuck Norris say when he stubbed his toe? "Oh shit I stubbed my toe."

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You're such a baby, that you are still in diapers! Ew! How would you know creep!

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your mamma so fat... she went to hell.

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Why was the Black Boy shot? It was because he was walking alone at night in a dangerous neighborhood, where there are many gangs. People should know not to go alone at night in dangerous places, or even in the day.

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why cant dinosaurs talk? because they're all dead.

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How do you stop a rhino from charging? An ak-47

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? lts of stuff like murder, rape, slavery, poverty, mindcontrol, mass genocide, the holocaust, racism, plagarism, physichal assault, war, terrorism, massacres, onsloughts, necrophillia, the dead rising, zombies, jokes on antijokes.com, awkward situations, dieing, cancer, ADHD, other mental illnesses, paint, the grim reaper, shinigami, stereotyping foreigners, prejudicism, bullying, armed robbery, hacking, viruses, incest, feral animals, getting lost in the forest, arsonry, pyromania, passing out in a bar, meeting a serial killer, and finding 2 worms in your apple.

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The way I see it, you are pretty lucky I am a tough guy, the kind you like. Anyway you where really wondering if I ever refer myself as a boy? Sigh, I mean I AM A BOY! WHAT? WHAT? Savage jokes? What jokes?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops