How do you get a priest out of a tree? Throw a canoe at him.

Women's Rights

How do you make an Indian explode? Push the red button

me and joey are going to watch the football game, at this point you relize you shouldn't hang out with joey and the other guy because it is joey and I not me and joey

A man is walking down the beach and he spots an antique looking lamp in the sand, he picks it up and rubs it. Nothing happens and the man begins to cry realizing that his life is so dismal and pathetic he was ready to believe he had found a magic lamp. He proceeds to run into the water and bash himself senseless with a large rock until he passes out and drowns.

What dd the man say to his wife? Make me a samich!

The awkward moment when you don't know whether to like or dislike this because you think I want like so you are gonna dislike but what If I want dislikes, but what if I want likes, you are confused Antijokeception....

Have you seen Stevie Wanders new house? No. Neither has he.

What's red and round? A red and round solid.

What's the difference between an ice cream cone and a pile of dead babies? I don't cum on the ice cream before I eat it.

What did the Chicken say to the Turkey Nothing, Chickens don't talk.

What is 6 1/2 inches when erected? My penis.

Why did the girl drown? She had no arms or legs and couldn't swim.

What's worse than stepping in tar? Getting your face ripped off by a man sized Tarantula

1st black guy: get a job 2nd black guy: i have one 1st black guy: okay

Why did the cat fall out of the tree? Cause the branch broke. Why did the baby fall out of the tree?Cause it was stapled to the cat.

How do you help a black person find a job ? Tell them places that are hiring.

Two muffins are in an oven. One muffin says to the other muffin, "Sure is hot in here." The other muffin says, "AHHHH! A talking muffin."

Did you hear the joke about the Israeli guy with the cruise missile down his pants? Me neither. I hope it's a good joke.

What do you call a man sitting at the bar drinking alone? An alcoholic.

What makes Stephen Hawking such a lame scientist??? A: He has a debilitating disease, it's called ALS.

Why did the blond paint in the nude? because she couldn't find her clothes, and wanted to express her emotions through art

Knock knock. Whose there? Jehovahs witnesses.

How do you make a clown frown Throw an axe at his face.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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