Unconventional thinking Something else out of one: So sometimes I feel there is something I want right? But I don't feel like I deserve it yet or i hesitate although I fucking want it So I go home, decide to take my time before I decide to buy it, and sit my ass on a chair covered with spikes until I decide it is time to get it, Moral 1: You want to take the better decision but don't feel time is right? Some spikes up your ass is not only the perfect way to change your mind, but in this case an excellent metaphor to why you want to keep doing whats best for you. Moral best: Think if you could get all that time you spent hesitating back, would that not be awesome? What if you just stop hesitating now? Would that not be aweso... Go fuckyourself... Nerometal Fuck Neronism... Cool name though

what does chicken and triceratops have in common both their jokes are anti-climatic, from lack of punchline

i bought a knock-knock joke book, and was unamused.

a guy walks into the bedroom with a duck in his arms, his wife is in bed half nakid. he then coments out loud this is the pig im f**king. his wife says huny your holding a duck. then he with a serious look on his face says im sory i wasent talking to you

death drives to the bus stop where 3 pensioners are waiting for a bus to london, and says GET IN THE VAN!

Why did the fireman wear red suspenders? To honor his father, Jonathan "Red" Hoffner, who was tragically killed in the line of duty. While attempting to save 3 small children in a trailer park fire, the elder firefighter suffered 3rd degree burns over 80 percent of his body. "Red" was rushed to a local hospital and lingered for several agonizing days. He began to rally but a careless error by a night nurse led to his unfortunate demise. His son was psychologically unable to wear anything but red suspenders every day for the rest of his life - not only because of his father's death but also because it was he who had maliciously set the fire in the first place.

Wh do you call a Zeebra without black and white stripes? A horse

A man walked into a bar Ouch!

Basically

Yo momma's so fat, she's most likely to be at risk of high cholesterol and should probably get herself tested at her nearest health clinic.

what came first the chicken or the chips

Adeeeellllleeeee where are my shorts

A mailman walks into a bar He delivers a bill for the electricity and leaves.

whats worse then a truck full of babies? if it went off a cliff into a canyon full of knives.

Why was Diana crying? Because she was penetrated.

Yo mama is so fat she has a gym membership and a diet plan to lose weight

Yo mama so fat, her wand is a Slim Jim

What happened when the chicken got to the other side of the road? It didn't, it got hit by a car.

Two drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff. They all fall on a small boy below, putting him into a 20-year coma.

Your mom.

How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? 17

why was the man sad? his wife died

Why did the plane crash Because the pilot was hit in the face with an axe

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead walk in to a barber shop They each ask the barber for haircuts of their preference.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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