Why was billy made fun of his whole life? Because he's mentally retarded

What's the capital of Hungary? Thirtsy

Knock, Knock Who's there? Anti-Joke Delivery Service. Oh, just leave it by the door.

What do a grape and an elephant have in common? They're both purple, except for the elephant.

What did the agnostic say when he turned blue? He said "wow why am I blue?"

GUESS WHAT ?????????? THATS WHAT CAOMHIN

Q: What did the poor man do when he saw a Ferrari? A: He realized that he would really enjoy having the money to buy such a nice vehicle, so he decided to take it upon himself to enroll in night classes. After many years of hard work, he earned a degree and a high-paying position at a large software corporation, and bought his dream car. He often told the story to his children as an example of what hard work and a goal in mind could achieve you. He lived a long, productive life and died fulfilled.

People Eating Tasty Animals

You attend a school atop a hill in the middle of the town. A river flows east of the hill, under the bridge built for the highway that runs two miles behind the school. You mother leaves for work at 6:00 a.m., and your brother leaves at 9:00 a.m. Schools starts at 7:30 a.m., and you have to pick up a sandwich on the way, for lunch. Also, you forgot to do an assignment that's due today, and it'll take you at least thirty minutes to complete it. How do you get to school on time? You walk.

david weres the slug gone

Bad grammers.

Roses are red, violets are blue, if i gave a rats ass, I'd worry about you.

Why couldn't Billy drive? He had no arms. Why did he have no arms? Thalidomide.

What do you call a person that is green, wearing plaid, and standing next to you in the elevator? What ever their name is

What is the difference between a duck? One of it's legs are both the same!

Homeless man....it's what's for dinner!

What did the facial stylist charge Jack Sparrow to get his ears pierced? A buc-an-ear!

Why did the chicken cross the road? To avoid being killed in the slaughter house.

Why did the Jew hate bananas? He was deathly allergic to them.

My girlfriend is getting an abortion tonight. Its a surprise.

Why did Bob wear a jumper and trousers even though it was a very hot day? Because he is an idiot.

What's hotter than a hot girl? The sun.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because I threw it after I chopped its' head off.

So you into art? You been to Louvre by the way?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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