Q: How do you make babies cry? A: Throw a brick at it's face.

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Why didn't Jacob marry Bella from Twilight? You have to be real to marry someone

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What is the difference between a white man and black man who are facing each other? They have different rights.

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Q: why did the train not make it to the station? A: it crashed and killed everybody on board.

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7 chickens ran down the road. One ate a spider. He is now the fattest chicken.

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Women.

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Yo mama's so fat that she pushed you off your computer and you couldnt write anymore "yo Mama" jokes.

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Ask me if I like pie. Do you like pie? OF COURSE!!!!!

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how bout that airplane foood!!!1

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I see said the blind man to his deaf wife as his crippled son pushed him in his wheelchair.

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Where do black guys sit in the bus? Enywhere theres a free seat

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a duck, a mexican, a camel, a jew, a duck, a moose, an asian, an ostrich, a turtle, an elephant, a scorpion, two vampires, a pokemon, your mom, Stephen Hawkings, a bird, a plane, mario, your family, and a plumber walk into a bar. They have cancer, AIDS, disabilties, diabetes, herpes, siezures, retardation, death in their families, drug addiction, no arms or legs, no home, no money, racial segregation, and have been raped. A combination of which is worse than the holocaust and three bee stings and a rope that fails.

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A man walks into a bar and poops his pants. He left because of the embarrassment.

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What's clear and wet? water

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If life gives you lemons.... Life is an abstract noun not a physical object so it can not give you lemons.

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Why is the chicken on the road? Cuz he died trying to get to the other side.

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What's the difference between the sky and the ocean? They're both blue

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Why did Justin Bieber break his leg? Because, like you and I, he is faced with the same challenges and dangers on a daily basis, and should all take necessary precautions in his every day life.

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What's one thing that bothers EVERYONE? Mother Theresa

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Your mama is so....well we've been friends since childhood and I know your mother passed away recently. So, as to refrain from being an insensitive jerk to a good friend. I will tell this joke to someone with a mother who is fat, dumb, lazy, ugly, or has a combination of these traits. Or has none of these and happens to be a nice lady with a son/daughter who just enjoys a good mama joke.

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A guy walks into a restaurant and sits down only to realize he is not wearing any pants. Immediately the police are called and arrest the man for indecent exposure. Given there were children in the restaurant at the time, the man is also charged as level 3 sex offender and is held on $100,000 bail. His family receives the news and become the talk of the town. His wife commits suicide from embarrassment, leaving her 10 year old son up for adoption who later gets involved with drugs due to his rough childhood.

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Your mom is so fat, every time she swims in the ocean, north america sinks because of the high water displacement caused by her giant body mass. (V1-V2=m)

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What worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings. What worse than two bee stings? The Holocaust What worse than the Holocaust? Three bee stings

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Why does mcguigan get made fun of ? Because he is gay with Jack Walsh

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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