What did the dog say to the cat Nothing dogs cant talk

A black man walked into a bar. He cashed in big on workers comp.

Knock knock. Who's there? Fire extinguisher. Fire extinguisher who? POMEGRANITES.

How many babies does it take to paint a wall? depends on how hard you throw them

5 people are walking

Why do girls wear makeup and perfume? Because they are ugly and they stink.

whats it called when a pimp slaps a ho? RESPECT

What do the world and jelly beans have in common? Nothing.

to get to the other side.

there was once a jew

A little boy came runing to his mum' mummy...can a little girl have ababy? Mom reply no...so, the boy ran out and told his frnd 'we can play naked again'.,

I walked up to my friend who's a drug addict holding a can of coke. I then told said friend that I liked the smell of coke. My friend then went on to snort 27 Kilos of cocaine.

Why did the chicken cross the road? There was no traffic for miles and the chicken was in search of basic needs.

why did joe drop his clock? billy ran into him, therfore making the clock wobble in his hand until it fell at 34 mph.

What did Batman say to robin before they got in the batmobile? "Robin, get in the batmobile!"

Whats more painful than falling onto a sharp stone? Suffering the loss of your mother and newborn brother in a tragic car accident on your birthday.

What's worse than 10 dead babies nailed to a tree? one dead baby nailed to ten trees

Q: What happened to the man who died? A: Nothing, there is no afterlife.

Is this the Krusty Krab? No, This is Patrick.

What did the Muslim receive for Christmas? Nothing. Muslims don't celebrate Christmas.

Q: What do Magic Johnson and Freddie Mercury have in common? A: Freddie Mercury is dead.

Why was the black guy being talked to by several policemen? Because he was advertising a new renting deal on an apartment downtown and the two policemen were openly gay and have a right to live together.

identical jokes get different votes.

Your cat was in pain after after a stack of books suddenly fell on it. It's pain is extra-strong so you give it ExtraStrength Tylenol. Guess what happens next time? Nothing. It takes only 50mg to 60mg of Tylenol to poison a cat. 1 ExtraStrength Tylenol tablet is about 10 times that amount (500mg). You killed your cat. It's dead now and there is no "next time"..

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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