Is this the krusty Crab? No you idiot this is a phone!!!!!

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So yesterday I went to find a pair of camo pants, And I did

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What do 69 and 420 have in common? That was my score on my Math final:(

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What do you get when you cross professor plum with a candle stick in the library? A dead prostitute. Try and be more careful next time.

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I like colin but not as much as apple

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OIO

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guys stop with the jewish jokes anne frainkly its getting old

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How do you make pie without the oven? I dont kow, go google it.

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I'm winning at Scrabble.

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New Name for Jersey Shore: American Whorer Story

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how does stephen hawking get an erection? he turns off his pop-up blocker

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Last week, I visited the Virgin Islands. Now it's just called Islands.

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Why did the man get ran over by th STREET? Because he crossed the TURTLE!

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whats worse than the holacost? your mom giving you cubes in your drink when you requested crushed instead

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A: "Knock knock." B: "Who's there?" A: "John Doe." B: "John Doe who?" A: "..."

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Are you kidding? If you can slow down time when stressed, then that means that your perception of time is, well... Oh relative, but still wow! What about now though? Can you do it? And for curiosity`s sake, what if you jumped off a roof? Would the stress make it all really slow?

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Why are black people afraid of white people? They aren't

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a 10 year old walks into a bar and orders a beer, he is then escorted out because you are not aloud to be under 21 years old to be in a bar

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Guess what i just did. Master bait.

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A man walks into a bar with a pack of Marlboros and promptly starts to light a cigarette. The bartender rushes over to stop him. "Hey! We don't allow smoking in here chump! Take it outside." The man replies with a big grin on his face. "Oh no sir. These ain't no ordinary cigarettes. My granddad gave me this pack a decade ago on his death bed." He pulls it out and shows the bartender 19 stale smokes. "He told me that any who took a single drag off any of them would have their biggest wish come true." the man recalled. The bartender had a perplexed look on his face and yelled "What the f*** are you talking about? Get out of here before I curb check your a**!" The man was then hastily escorted out by security. He then died 4 days later from autoerotic asphyxiation.

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

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What's the difference between Tiger Woods and a rock? The rock doesn't cheat on it's wife.

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how many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop? Not enough

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Try this on your friend Have him start with "knock knock" Then blankly stare at him, if he asks you To reply tell him no one is home

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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