what is purple and fly? - a purple flying.

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Why was the kid mad? Because he died.

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Whats the difference between a field of corn and a dead body? The field of corn wasn't killed by severe blood loss and hemorrhaging after it was stabbed in the back, stomach and abdomen 27 times in 1987, where the escaped convicted serial killer buried it beside a river in Northern Dakota.

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there was a Black and Mexican in a car who was driving? the cop

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What do you get on anti-jokes.com? A bunch of repeated "jokes", that don't make any sense.

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A pterodactyl walks into a bar, bartender says "What'll you have." To which the pterodactyl graciously replies "RAAAAAAAAWWWWWWWRRRRRRRRR." Because pterodactyl's do not speak English.

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Me and my wife set and watch the eleven o'clock news every night. My wife always thinks that she has the different disease that is mentioned each day. One night she was practically in tears telling me that she had the disease that was talked about that night. I looked at her and said "honey, there is no way that you have testicular cancer. You don't even have testiculars." The End

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Why did the spoon say hi to the fork? To initiate a conversation.

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Daym im romantic

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A black man takes a girl home from a nightclub. She says "Show me it's true what they say about black men". So he reveals a big penis and they have sex there and then.

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What did the redneck say about his missing tractor? Where's my tators.

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Why did the little boy run away from the beach? Hurricane Irene.

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How much dub could a dubstep dub if a dubstep could step dub?

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My friend Keith found a worm in his apple. He ate it anyways

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I want a lot of likes...do it you wont. i know you wont.

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(Knocks on Helen Keller's door) You: Knock knock Helen:....

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How did the Jew escape the concentration camp? He didn't he was caught and put in the gas chamber.

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What's like a whale and has a sprained leg? MATT ROSS THE FAT ARSE!!!!

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Q-What do you call a woman in the kitchen? A- A woman making me a damn sammich thats what.

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Q: What did the German say to the Jew? A: Guten Tag.

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Your Mother

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Nah, could not care less about how I sound on "The network", its just that I spent all night finishing the core concept to my new novel, and all the capital letters and stuff sound like Jim Carrey in my head as I type. So Redcunt, where you going? When you coming back?

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What did the lawyer say to the Black man? Your case came through, the murderer of your wife has been caught

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue Some poems rhyme This doesn't.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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