HOW LONG is a Chinese name?

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Elizabeth Warren

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Why didn't the man jump out of his window when his house was on fire? Because he is afraid of heights.

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What will happen if your heart skips 10 beats? Nothing. You're dead.

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What did one gothic person say to another gothic person? Nothing. Gothic people only cut themselves.

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If it bothers you? I am just saying that, fucking alright ill be slightly less cruel, I mean come on! It does not matter shit what others think! If someone ever tries to assault you because you are associated with me (yeah it happens), I will stand in front of you and KILL (and possibly rape) THEM!

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What's worse than getting raped? Getting anal raped twice

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Why did a man throw butter out the window ? So he could see butter fly and then realized that there was one on window cil

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Why didn’t the skeleton go to see a scary movie? Because skeletons don't have eyes, and can not watch movies.

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The government

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what is friendship? when friends go on a ship

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What's better than a nice hot shower on a cold, rainy day? Osama bin Laden rotting away at the bottom of the ocean.

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Roses are red, violets are blue Charcoal is black, and so is my neighbor

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how did the family die? They were shot in the head.

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field day?

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Knock Knock whose there YOUR MOM

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Whats cooler than being cool in High School? Nothing, now take a hit...everyone's looking

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Q: How did the blonde girl get into Harvard? A: hard work, dedication, and a perfect SAT score.

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Dad always said that laughter was the best medicine. Maybe that's why he died of tuberculosis.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Cars were invented after her death, so she never had the opportunity to learn.

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What did Jesus say to the giraffe? Good day to you sir.

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Several ways to annoy people: Grab the end of their shirt to blow your nose Try to shove a bowling ball down there throat Try to sell them a broom and vacuum Try to eat their babies paint their toe Nibble their ankles Ask if you can babysit their crystal and if they say no start whining Carry around your chicken and ask if they want a nugget

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What do you call cheese that doesn't belong to you? Someone else's cheese.

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Whats black and can multitask? My IPod you racist!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops