Why does the man ignore his wife? Because he is dead.

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What's sad about 4 black people in a Cadillac going over a cliff? The incident happened to substantiate stereotypes and condone racism.

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Your mom is so fat that she has diabetes

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The body system was looking for a leader!? Heart - I am because I circulate the blood Brain - I should be because I control the body Liver - I should because I feed Anus - No, I am All laugh The anus held closed for seven days. The liver exploded the brain stewed and the heart stopped beating. Anus - Now, what am I?!

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What's white, wet, and sticky? A tissue that I just blew my nose with.

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Has u seen my grammar?

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Jesse is so fat that Roy is jealous of his big ass tits

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Why did Chuck Norris start crying? Because he was in a coma

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'Doctor, doctor, I think I'm a pair of curtains' Doctor prescribes antipsychotics.

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Why was the Jewish man in jail? He lit a local CVS on fire.

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Hey i just met you, and this is crazy, here's some candy, gent in the van.

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It's so hot even chuck noris can't withstand this shit.

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What do you can an astronaut with an apple? Never mind, I have a boner.

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Penis.

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Why did the man remain calm when the judge passed the death sentence? Because he was in another country and had no connection with the case.

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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Two muffins were in the oven...They were taken out after about 40 minutes, and then enjoyed by all.

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A woman was in the kitchen making a sandwich for her husband. Shortly after she brings the sandwich to him and he thanks her seeing as his disabled legs prevent him from walking to the kitchen and making one himself. His wife later heads to her job as a firefighter.

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Your momma is so dumb she has to have weekly tutoring to help understand finding the value of x in an equation.

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Why did the boy drop his ice-cream? He was shot in the back, knifed in the face, kicked in the groin, poo'd on by an alpaka, had frogs stapled to his face, his hair burnt off, pushed off a cliff, eaten by a scorpian, lost his arms legs and eyeballs, squashed by a hippo, ran over by a buss, truck and cement mixer, had cement poured on his frogs (that were stapled to his face), became morbidly obese, was raped by a chicken, was served as sauce at an italian resturant, was done by his mother's father's grandson, broke both of his detatched legs, crashed his car, went into a time machine and was crushed by a stegosaurous, had a lemon squesed in his detatched eyes, got high on cokeawana, was crushed to death by a garbage disposer and was rejected by the hobo at the shelter? no, actually, he tripped

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Why did the Chicken cross the road? Because it thought that it would somehow increase its chances of survival.

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whats green and falls from trees, pool tables.

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A priest, a minister and a rabbit were seated next to each other on an airplane. They all had to pay for lunch.

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Bean.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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